Don't Do It, ASkars!
Page Six says that at Vanity Fair's after-Oscar party on Sunday night, Swedish lightning rod ASkars dropped in on the hand of Zeus and after waving away trick after trick throwing their soppy wet coochies at him, he zeroed his glare on the youngest Olsen, Elizabeth Olsen. ASkars' ex-piece Kate Bosworth was also at the party, but I don't think she saw anything since one of the janitors mistook her for a brittle broom and used her to sweep up all the chocha dust that exploded everywhere when ASkars glided in.
A witness tells P6 that ASKars and Elizabeth Olsen were locked in each other's words in a dark corner for a long time. The witness didn't say if "talking in a corner" led to "Elizabeth climbing Mt. ASkars to explore his mouth cavern of orgasms with her tongue," which would eventually lead to Elizabeth frolicking all over ASkars' naked body. So let's hope it doesn't go past the corner.
I have nothing against Elizabeth Olsen. She's like the Marilyn Munster of the Olsens. She's harmless, but my allegiance forever belongs to the health and well-being of ASkars' Swedish nipple knobs. If shit gets serious between ASkars and Elizabeth, he'll eventually have to sit at the dinner table with the Olsen Trolls. ASkars' charm could make a dead vulture's peen swoon, but his powers have no effect on those evil Olsen Trolls. They would scurry up his body, slide down his mouth and eat him from the inside/out. The next time we'd see ASkars' nipples is when the Olsens wear them as earrings. This Elizabeth Olsen and ASkars thing can't happen. ASkars' nipples are at stake. Fartfull! (Fartfull isn't only the name of an Ikea bench, it's also my favorite Swedish curse word.)
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Ewww...he is old enough to be her teenage father on that one night after prom when the condom broke.
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"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity
Submitted by 130490laura on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 3:22pm.
It seems he goes for a certain type of woman, American, blonde, very very skinny, boring and an actress.
Submitted by loopygorilla on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 12:42am.
Askars certainly has a type.
He likes the whispy blondes, skinny but he doesnt mind bony anorexic, pale skin types.
I have seen her recently in a movie, and she's not "very skinny", on the contrary. Might not show on that pic but she definitely has curves and has a very different body type than her sisters.
It seems he goes for a certain type of woman, American, blonde, very very skinny, boring and an actress. Guess that rules me out! If he ever fancies an English, brunette, UK size 10, interesting (I like to think so) scientist then I'm more than available....
Askars certainly has a type.
He likes the whispy blondes, skinny but he doesnt mind bony anorexic, pale skin types.
I guess i better look at some gene replacement therapy (like in james bond's movie die another die) and turn myself into a skinny blonde chick with a penis and go ride on that scandanavian dick.
Submitted by TrashyWilma on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 7:50pm.
I can't hate on her. She can act, she's resisted the pressure to starve herself and she had to grow up in the shadow of the Soulless, Evil, Heroin-Addicted Trolls.
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Well, to be fair, only one of the twins was doing heroin and crack. The other one gets dragged down with it, I guess.
I can't hate on her. She can act, she's resisted the pressure to starve herself and she had to grow up in the shadow of the Soulless, Evil, Heroin-Addicted Trolls.
He's turning out to be quite the manwhore
Submitted by buttersparkle on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 2:02pm.
swedes with large foreheads? what about wonder twins daniel and henrik??
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; ) Well, that is what I always think! lol. I saw Daniel at Whole Foods and his head doesn't look nearly as large in person...I think it must be the helmet and shit. I went back to my mate who was waiting outside with our bikes and I said "His head doesn't look so massive!" lol.
I was thinking the same thing that he is 13 yrs older, but I remember dating a couple of guys that much older or more even when I was 22. lol.
I think he looks like a hockey player, big head and all, and he seems pretty nice. Not all that sexy though.
Eh, if this is true it's a little creepy since she's 23 and ASkars is 35, but other then that they're both famous-ish actors who are generally good looking. I don't think it's going to be a big thing.
Everybody loves him, but I think it says something about a tall, athletic guy if his last girl friend was petite, younger anorexic type and now he is going after another petite girl over a decade his Jr.
just a little creepy, like how George Clooney never dates women that are anywhere his age or power/money/fame level
Submitted by salacious on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 3:39pm.
WHY???? Don't you remember me!?! You and I... thick as thieves! :'(
We used to be friends!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bm1g5Yg0hUw&ob=av3e
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HI SAL OF COURSE I REMEMBER YOU my goodness.
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
Submitted by suckandfuck on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:10pm.
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Reported. Miguelina please ban this guy. Have you no decency? My goodness.
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WHY???? Don't you remember me!?! You and I... thick as thieves! :'(
We used to be friends!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bm1g5Yg0hUw&ob=av3e
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"Sal, darling, you are the reason some women go gay. ♥" - Submitted by Dog on Fri, 07/09/2010 - 6:32pm.
"life is precious, you must not have watched The Lion King, you heartless fuck"
Hype for the tabloids but if it is true his career is over. Dating Bosworth caused so much shade on him by his kooky fans that if this is true his done with the main fanwomen, and the Olsens... Good lord I had no idea they made another one, a younger one. The first ones are like 10 & this dude like 40, wtf! Btw I can't stand anything Olsen so if this happens I hope his persona is flushed down the toilet serves him right for frolicking in the troll fields!
"Marilyn Munster of the Olsens."
LOL the most perfect description ever written on Dlisted.
Submitted by Gem on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:28pm.
I like my men a little more beat-up looking (meaning: NOT cuter than me!)
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^ Cosign. This has always been my rule.
"Shalikla!"
all those olsen girls need to evaporate. damn they're ugly.
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
Submitted by whippersnapper on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 2:02pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:24pm.
He has enough room for a entire second face up there.
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unless they were showing a movie with him in it.
yeah, she was supposedly really good in that Mary Martha Melissa ???? movie
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:24pm.
On second look his forehead really is massive, you could show a movie on that thing!
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He has enough room for a entire second face up there.
swedes with large foreheads? what about wonder twins daniel and henrik??
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z6tBr6PMkBY
hahaha.......
She was in a movie this year with a bunch of words starting with an M. Marcy, May something something (too lazy to google). She was actually getting a lot of Oscar buzz but I guess it didn't end up working out. *shrugs*
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You really have to side clap and pucker for a piece who can stand next to a white feather and out-gay it. - MK 8/3/2011
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:47pm.
I got the joke. I just wanted to see how you'd answer her about who or what you date when you know I'm here and IF is also around here somewhere. Duuuuur.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by Dog on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:38pm.
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:37pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:05pm.
"She's actually hot, she has a pretty smile and doesn't live under a bridge so you know...she's got that goin for her anyway."
Doesn't live under a bridge? Tee hee. Whamo, who have you been dating, or should I ask 'what'?
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Yeah, Wham-It! Go ahead and answer that one! HA!
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The joke was she doesn't live under a bridge like her troll sisters. Joke....FAIL??
Anyway the women I date don't live under bridges they live under "modern engineered transportation spans" big diff!
AND the best thing about dating homeless women is when the dates over you can drop them off anywhere!
I can't hate on this chick. She can act, she doesn't feel the need to starve herself, and she grew up in the same house as the Evil, Soulless, Heroin-Addicted Trolls.
This is the lesser of evils.
I didn't know the Olsen trolls had another sister. She's not worth billions like them I guess.
Cool, Cuppy. Don't be too hard on him/her.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Yeah, Wham-It! Go ahead and answer Mickey! HA!
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:05pm.
"She's actually hot, she has a pretty smile and doesn't live under a bridge so you know...she's got that goin for her anyway."
Doesn't live under a bridge? Tee hee. Whamo, who have you been dating, or should I ask 'what'?
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"We are here on earth to do good for others.
What the others are here for, I don't know."
W.H. Auden
Submitted by Deb on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:17pm.
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:15pm.
He is waay hotter than Clooney, Pitt or any of the other so-called "Hot men in Hollywood".
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Cuppy, you got frosting on your glasses?!
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Nope, sure don't. I just happen to like Swedes. He's tall, which in Hollywood is rare, as I detest shrimps, except for the exceptionally shrimpy Renner, who I adore, probably because he can act. Anyway, just my opinion.
Gotta go, my appt is here LATE and I am not amused!
Toodles!
I must confess that I don't watch any vampire shows or movies. Last one I saw was the one with Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise, "Interview with a Vampire", and I didn't much like it.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
I'm pretty sure this twink is a sausage wrangler.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
The Olsen twins sitting at a dinner table.... *snort* Like that ever happens.
dlist so right on this one. Look what The Olsen She Devils did to Heath Ledger.
I luvvvvvvvvvvvvv him.
And she's alot more attractive AND talented than her troll sisters.
BTW, MK - are you tripping on zee magic mushrooms again? Where I can get some, huh?
I like my men a little more beat-up looking (meaning: NOT cuter than me!)
Dude is Velveeta and Hellman's on Wonder Bread. He makes Anderson Cooper seem exotic.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
He was hot for like the first two seasons of True Blood.
Over it.
Submitted by Rdeadline on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:17pm.
BIG MONEY!
BIG MONEY!
He's no fool.
I think so, too. Cha-ching.
On second look his forehead really is massive, you could show a movie on that thing!
I've never seen the attraction with this trick. He looks speshul to me like maybe he's a "put the lotion in the basket" kind of guy.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
I don't get the appeal, either, but I've never seen him in action. I loved his dad in Breaking the Waves, though, and Stellan doesn't look like much in stills, so maybe it's a charm thing.
This Olsen at least has a pretty face. Kate Bosworth is too skinny, has a bobblehead, there's nothing pretty about her at all imo.
sadness. he is so fucking hot. too fucking hot. but I actually kind of like all of the olsen trolls, on that same note. don't fucking judge me...or do, whatevs.
Just watched Martha Mae Marleen ???
This weekend it was pretty good. It's about some girl who joins a cult and comes back.home two years later and is fucked up in the head. Anyways she played her role very.well. Looks like she has ate and isn't cold and fragile.
Her second film is.about to come out soon. I think it's some slasher film.
*sorry posting from my phone
Yeah I would.
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I've got ten bucks and me and dirty eddie are staying out all weekend! - Rob Pue (thank you BBitch and Sweetas)
The difficult brown?! I think we're all done here. -MK
who made up this shit? i thought he was ghey?
MK likes his pieces as white bread as they come.
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"That's what Jesus would do. Give you a blunt when you're down." MK
"I'm from the New Jersey where we say "AYY! FUCKA YOUA PIZZA PIE!!!" " Sucky
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 1:15pm.
He is waay hotter than Clooney, Pitt or any of the other so-called "Hot men in Hollywood".
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Cuppy, you got frosting on your glasses?!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
You are just bloody genius!!
How can you take a simple story, and make everyone just snort their way through your lines, and choke on silly "MaBooh"-like laughter, and have ones colleagues stare as if you should be in the loony bin.
Here's to the true Artist, Michael K!