Open Post: Hosted By A First Degree Hotness Murderer
What in the hell kind of GD shit is Johnny Depp on, because looking like this is only okay if you're a hungover colorblind 8-year-old circa 1977 or if you've passed out in the bushes after fucking a hooker and she stole all your clothes so you had to get new ones from a nearby Salvation Army bin. No grown ass man should be wearing jeans by OshKosh B'Gosh. Johnny isn't fighting the hotness, he's killing it not-so-softly. Johnny is starting to make Keef Richards look fap-able.
Johnny looks like he smells like what peen cheese tastes like. Somebody needs to give this bitch a donation. But there is hope. Johnny is wearing a medium blue hanky on his right side and that means he's into everything but 69ing. I hope "everything" includes giving him a full body soapy handjob in the shower and following it up with a Palmolive facial. It cuts the grease.
The real hotness is the guy on the right side of the frame, with the box of donuts or whatever that is.
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"Two whores don't make a right"-- M.K.
"Any guy who values stick thin and young over smarts and personality isn't worth it and has NOTHING interesting to say anyway."-- Mrs. Kravitz
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 8:16pm.
WOOOOO HOOOOOO! My mom just called and my parents are taking me to Hawaii in September! Total surprise~
**You lucky duck! I've never been to Hawaii and have always wanted to go. I'll trade with you. We are going on Mexican Riviera cruise. I'd much rather lay out on a beach in Hawaii, than dodge bullets from the drug cartels.Congrats! Maybe one day I'll get there too. lol***
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I've written a letter to MK...saying...I...love...youuuuuu.
i atill would.....hard!
i find him gross. and pretentious. and a bad actor
M U S T S T A R T D A Y W I T H B I R T H D A Y S L U T
HB Dinah Shore who would be 96 but lives on in many hearts
Also it is just beyond me how these types so obsessively defend someone you know they wouldn't have had even the slightest inkling of interest in back in her "wild" days, but now that she's coupled with Brad Pitt and is Philanthropic Earth Mother...
Same goes for Johnny Depp. But whatever. You can have Johnny Depp in his bloated, dumb-accent phase of life.
I decided to look at celebitchy while I was wasting time waiting for this download to finish. I don't look at that site like I used to because, clearly, it has become Brangeloonie central.
The majority of the commenters there seriously believe Angelina was joking/"taking the piss" with the whole leg thing. Like, they apparently don't know their queen well enough to even realize she was clearly drunk (at the least), because she's never had that wild-eyed hysterical look any other time I can remember. Like, who exactly would that joke be aimed toward, and for what purpose? Yeah, sure, she, Brad, and George made some elaborate plan. Right. These people are delusional. She made a fool of herself. Bottom line.
NO but I mean what is the band;logo;cause etc that is on his t-shirt. Anyone know?
Kissing Ass and Cupping Balls. You're Welcome.
Hi Mickey, I'll join ya, hope ESE is ok tonight/this morning!
Spaz, that was a lovely song!
OT: Can't hate JohnnyD, he was hot before the scruff! Now, he's too looney and UNfappable hahahahah ;P
To anyone still up, night!
♥---♥---♥
"Nasty cotton fucker!" MK
I can smell him from here.
*sings 'People' for ESE*
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"We are here on earth to do good for others.
What the others are here for, I don't know."
W.H. Auden
Submitted by Gobbler on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 11:16pm.
Yes Gobbler, they are ground.
How ya been doin?
I don't think he's hot to begin with, so no crime here.
I would still step over my grandmother to hit that...I so would...
http://youtu.be/5d4D9xBErkc
I would have liked to have seen Adele punch J Hudson. She is so fucking annoying with her big head singing those shit songs.
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I've paid my dues, time after time
I've done my sentence, but committed no crime
And bad mistakes, I've made a few
I've had my share of sand kicked in my face
But I've come through
Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 5:36pm.
He looks like he smells. No thanks.
And I am really trying to figure out why the guy in the main picture trying to get the autograph looks familiar!??!?!
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I thought the same exact thing! Perhaps we have seen him autograph hounding before in other pictures.
"Shalikla!"
Oh hell no, JHud, with your bobblehead ass and your lucky ass Oscar (what have you done lately, btw?).
Leave Adele alone goddammit. Besides, I'm sure JHud's giant head is out as soon as Jessica pops.
Submitted by kissingassandcu... on Wed, 02/29/2012 - 12:27am.
What is on his t-shirt?
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My best guess is yesterday's lunch?
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...the end
That was really bitchy of JHud.
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The poster formerly known as Snow Owl formerly known as ¡Búho Del Invierno!
This is horrible....but I hope JHud gains all the weight back. Biatch.
He looks HORRIBLE. Just awful. The bum that hangs out at my local grocery looks better.
JD can do whatever the fuck he wants, IMO.
Sometimes I cant work out whether Johnny is trying to be alternative or he really is like that.
But i did think it was cool that he turned up to that primary school (elementary school in USA) dressed as captain jack sparrow cuz one of the little girls wrote a letter to him telling him how much their class loved jack sparrow.
What is on his t-shirt?
Kissing Ass and Cupping Balls. You're Welcome.
Rich people are craaaaaaaaazy!
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 9:18pm.
Question- I just started using Flax seeds in my food. Do they make you gassy? I have been super gassy since I started eating them.
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Haayy Cuppy!
Are you grinding the flax seeds a bit before eating them? Whole flax seeds are indigestible due to their hard outer shell. I use a little coffee grinder for mine. I put ground flax seeds in my protein shakes, oatmeal, yogurt and baked goods.
Honestly, I think that if you knew Johnny Depp well enough to fuck him on the regular, eat dinner with him on the regular or do anything with him every two to three months or so, it would be so much fun and so much more interesting than whatever you are doing now that you could give a flying fuck what the man is wearing.
Honestly.
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We worked hard for our money! So hard for it, honey!
Wait, he's wearing clothes? I was blinded by the hotness.
Submitted by Dog on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 9:21pm.
No, I get a lot of fiber from the healthy part of my diet, so it can't be that.
I just like the seeds better Dog. They are easier to use daily than an oil would be. I am dying to try the Chia seeds you suggested too.
I am really trying to eat healthier, and not like a 16 yr old World of Warcraft video geek!
*peels daily banana*
Guest - Sans Fards speaks da troof! Vietnamese food is wonderful. It borrows from traditional Asian fare with a strong emphasis from French food. Yummy yummy! I was not food adventurous a decade ago but now will eat anything that doesn't eat me first, lol! My favoritist place is Huynh (www.huynhrestauranthouston.com).
The Goi Vit (duck salad appetizer) is delicious and perfect for the hot summer days. I love Pho (pronounced 'fuh') but I tend to stick with eye of round steak as my meat choice. Mr. Spot has had the version with beef tendon in it and said it wasn't too bad. You gotta go guest; you'll kick rocks at regular Chinese food from now on.
BTW, I got my chinese from Hunan Village in Conroe. Clean & reliable for ol' Spotty here! If you've only seen some of the stuff I've witnessed with food safety, you might die. ;-)
Evil, flax shouldn't give you gas unless you really don't get any fiber at all. But there are always exceptions. The chia seeds, for instance, make me gassy and I've never heard of them doing that to anyone else. You know you can get flax also by using flaxoil in your salads or on veggies, and flaxoil pills, right?
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by Dog on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 8:53pm.
LOL! Dog, I dare not say ANYTHING to her, because I will never hear the end of it! She already thinks my parents "spoil" me, and that I am some princess who gets everything I want (I bloody well wish that were the case). She will be mad just knowing I have plans for my vacation that require advance notice!
Question- I just started using Flax seeds in my food. Do they make you gassy? I have been super gassy since I started eating them.
Submitted by guest on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 7:24pm.
Jack...♥ Nite.
Lol Spotty! I haz never eaten Vietnamese. Is it good? Where'd ya get yer Chinese food from tahday?
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Yes!!! Vietnamese food is the shit.
I live in No. Virginia around the D.C. area, the place that has to be the Vietnamese capital of the USA--because there are so many fantastic pho joints around here. There's the marvelously addictive pho (beef noodle soup), which I could pretty much live on...caramel pork, grilled chicken with lemongrass, spring rolls, banh mi sandwiches (kind of like a cubano)...OMG you really can't go wrong. Try it TODAY.
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"One does not simply walk into Mordor..."
Eeeevil, please make sure you rub Payless Pam's face in it. Thank you and carry on.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Thanks Doggie! I can't wait! I am so going in to work tomorrow to get that time off waaaay in advance so there is no fuck up come vacation time.
I haven't gotten to travel to a fun destination in forever, so this is sooooo welcomed and totally unexpected! THANX PARENTS!
Mickey Rourke.
OMG, Evil, I'm so happy for you. I've never been to Hawaii, either. I hope you haz a fanntoostic time!
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
@Doggie and Louise- Sure, come along, if you don't mind hanging out with parents! I have to say, I actually like hanging with my mom and dad. We have fun, and since I don't see them very often, the time I do spend with them, I really enjoy, SO, if you don't mind parents, pack your suits and tanning lotion and come along!
I have never been to Hawaii, so I am super (kid like) excited about going. We will be gone for 10 days, so hopefully I will see tons of cool stuff!
I think I am going to start working out, just in case a cute guy or two catches my eye!
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 8:16pm.
Awesome!! Have a drink in a pineapple and think of us!
Poor Vanessa.
Pappasitos is the best! If anyone has a layover in Houston, go to Terminal C.
In LA, try La Talpa. On Pico blvd. Great table salsa, spicy. Great posole, cocido.
King Taco - try their tacos and tamales.
Tacos Mexico - love their cheap tacos. Try lengua "tongue" tacos with lots of lime. Green salsa not red.
Eeeeeeeeeeeevil, can I come? Pleasepleaseplease???
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
WOOOOO HOOOOOO! My mom just called and my parents are taking me to Hawaii in September! Total surprise~
*does happy cupcake dance*
Submitted by ditquoi on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 6:41pm.
What an ass! Reformed fatties, smokers, drinkers, and the newly religious are the worst. Really, we see that you aren't fat, smoking, drunk, or whatever and if we want more information, we will consult you. Until then stfu.
My husband has this cousin who found Jesus and started sending us all letters (via snail mail, so old-timey!) that we needed to get right with God because we were sinners. Then she couldn't figure out why no one wanted to hang out with her anymore. Cause you were a lot less preachy when you were a drunk whore, you drunk whore!
I'm sure his ensemble costs more than I make in a year, but it's ugly as hell and I'd rather shop at Ross than wear that designer shit he's wearing! Is that a drunken smile or a secret smile?
Only MK, "Palmolive facial," lol!!!! A true wordsmith. *genuflects*
I blame gap-toothed Vanessa Purgatorie for this mess. Johnny needs extra layers of cloth to shield himself from that sickly hag, so his attire is sensible under the circumstances. Unless this is John Mayer.
Submitted by ditquoi: "did y'all hear about this?
http://www.celebitchy.com/210561/adele_is_pissed_at_jennifer_hudson_afte..."
AH HAHAHAHA!
That's just rude.
JHud is going the way of Starr Jones, anyway. FAT AGAIN. (Not that JHud was that bad to begin. She was heavy, but I didn't think she looked bad. I think she looks worse now.)
I saw Starr Jones on something, and she blew up again. She was perched on a chair and looked really uncomfortable, tryng to press her legs together and look thin. I almost felt sorry for her.
Do not be like this guys. She will be in trouble soon :
http://www.facebook.com/groups/321735501204511/
HA HA! I love this...
Submitted by oh dave on Tue, 02/28/2012 - 6:25pm.
"I approve of the steel-toe boots. When you dress like that you might have to kick your way out of a situation."
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"I like to dissect girls. Did you know I'm utterly insane?" - Patrick Bateman
HATE those dumb hats he always seems to insist on wearing.
I'd rather see him in a sombrero or a top hat, or even those big tall fuzzy hats the guards at Buckingham palace wear than those lame fedoras (or whatever it is).
Get a new style of hat, Johnny.