The Birth Of Venus Ain't Got Shit On This
At the Uffizi Gallery in Florence, Italy this morning, workers took down Botticelli's Birth of Venus and replaced it with this set of La Duquesa de Alba in a bikini pictures, because this is some real art that will splash your eyes with salty exquisiteness and diamond-dusted glamour. Venus had a good run, but the bitch is dusty and now it's time to pay homage to a fresh new modern day goddess of the sea.
The Daily Mail burned the tips of my eyelashes last week when they published a glorious gallery of pictures of the 86-year-old klingon dandelion the Duchess of Alba making bitches bow down in the sand at a beach in Formentera, Spain. Well, since yesterday was a holy day, the Duchess of Alba was back at the beach and with the help of her lady-in-waiting and her 61-year-old man toy of a husband, she cleansed the ocean water with the drops of holy nectar that seep out of her pores. Or she cleansed it by peeing. Either or.
The olds of my family are always saying shit like, "Getting old sucks." I don't know what they're crying about. Getting old is the best. You can curse out a kid and get away with it. And as these pictures prove, you can put on a two-piece and any hate thrown at you by younger bitches will have zero effect on you. Because any fucks you had left in your being, were humped out of your body earlier in the day by your 61-year-old hot piece.
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serewr
Poor woman; all the wealth, titles, privilege and yet not in a single picture of her does she wear a decent bra. They just hang there without proper support.
She's so feeble she can't stand and sit on her own and needs two people to hold her up and help her sit down. One of them her caretaker/husband. That's some hard gold digging. Let's hope they don't release a sex tape.
She looks cute in that pic!
Love,
Mabel
I wonder if he screams out, "Ay dios mio, Maria del Rosario Cayetana Alfonsa Victoria Eugenia Francisca Fitz-James Stuart y de Silva!!" when they are doing the deed?
I didn't know you could get cottage-cheese arms!
She's got money, titles, and a hot piece of ass. What the hell does she care what we think?
I think she's amazing.
That should be a headline: "Spielberg gives up movies to be with his true love, the Duchess."
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:04pm.
It's like Pale Man from Pan's Labyrinth fucked a Koopa Troopa and they surgically removed the shell after she was born.
I want to praise her confidence at her age, but I don't think confidence made her go out like that.
----
Lucifer_Sam, you are a genius.
4.7 billion? I think Spain needs its money back.
Where do you even begin with these pics/this relationship? No.
____
“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.” —Carl Sagan (RIP C.Hitchens, Winehouse, Houston, MCA, Dillon, Armstrong) *caprica six was/is here*
Man, Kevin Kline's career took a shit didn't it?
I like my men like I like my syrup---thick and rich!
You know you're rich when Steven Spielberg is your paid escort.
Submitted by jackie on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:01pm.
Her body isn't half bad. Compared to her face it's a ten.
--------------------------------
It's true!! Really great waistline. Look at the body of the women (assistant?) next to her. She's a lot younger but looks pudgy with a lot of back fat and no waist.
Her face is super creepy. Even when she was young she was not attractive at all.
The dude looks good for 61.
I'm glad you guys are a little more realistic and less ass-kissing than the people on CeleBitchy, who are falling all over themselves proclaiming how great this woman is for wearing a bikini at 86. These are the same individuals who slam Madge left and right for not dressing like the "old person" she is. O_o;
¡El diamante mas bello de España! Bravo!
_________________________
The poster formerly known as SnowOwl, formerly known as Nightowl!
I cannot stop laughing at some of the comments today!!!!!
LMFAO that his torso has the sads.
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 3:48pm.
*snatches Whamo's ticket to Hell*
I laughed.
Submitted by agirl on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 4:12pm.
Submitted by EvilShoe on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 3:43pm.
Submitted by agirl on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:31pm.
Submitted by EvilShoe on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:25pm.
No idea!
ETA: I looked to Yahoo Answers and found this:
Does female pubic hair fall out with age?
After not having sex for 10 years, I finally got the nerve to get ED medicine from my doctor. After a little unexpected foreplay I found my wife to have no pubic hair. I was shocked. She says her pubic hair fell out. She is almost 60 and has gone thru menopause. Is it possible that it fell out or do you think she shaved it off? Kind of bums me out.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100916110119AAuD9wX
__________________________
The best answer said for him to use Suave shampoo, LMAO not sure why.
----------------------
Suave shampoo? on TEH PUBES?
Today Dlisted is full to the brim with WTF.
(I thank you for the research, if not the confirmation that punanes go bald)
============================
That's the first time I've heard that one! I'm only 47, and that's not happening. I'd try Revitalash. buy a gallon of that shit, and start growing a new crop.
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:53pm.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:33pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:31pm.
I'm sure she likes to do in a fluorescent lit room, and she like a little tongue work to get her goin..
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Whoa... 4.7 billion?? I've changed my mind. I'd tap that in broad daylight in the middle of Time Square.
=========================================
Ah haaa!! lol, I too had second thoughts when I heard that. I mean how much longer can she live!? I do believe this is what Viagra was invented for!
______________________________________________
you two need your own individual and joint "I Just Can't With You" tags
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
That dude totally looks like Spielberg!
Does female pubic hair fall out with age?
After not having sex for 10 years, I finally got the nerve to get ED medicine from my doctor. After a little unexpected foreplay I found my wife to have no pubic hair. I was shocked. She says her pubic hair fell out. She is almost 60 and has gone thru menopause. Is it possible that it fell out or do you think she shaved it off? Kind of bums me out.
__________________________________________________
I think it tends to stop growing as your hormonal balance is shifted. Estrogen flow is just not the same after menopause. It slows down. My Mom's hair has stopped growing (i.e., leg hair). Now, the pubes I have NO IDEA about...never want to know about. Never heard of this. It could be hormonal. I cannot imagine that it is dangerous. Never hurts to ask the gynecologist.
Submitted by EvilShoe on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 3:43pm.
Submitted by agirl on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:31pm.
Submitted by EvilShoe on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:25pm.
No idea!
ETA: I looked to Yahoo Answers and found this:
Does female pubic hair fall out with age?
After not having sex for 10 years, I finally got the nerve to get ED medicine from my doctor. After a little unexpected foreplay I found my wife to have no pubic hair. I was shocked. She says her pubic hair fell out. She is almost 60 and has gone thru menopause. Is it possible that it fell out or do you think she shaved it off? Kind of bums me out.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100916110119AAuD9wX
__________________________
The best answer said for him to use Suave shampoo, LMAO not sure why.
----------------------
Suave shampoo? on TEH PUBES?
Today Dlisted is full to the brim with WTF.
(I thank you for the research, if not the confirmation that punanes go bald)
Submitted by fleur_de_lis on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 2:58pm.
Submitted by TexnDoc on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:44pm.
I read this morning about a Canadian bride.
Found a link:
http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/08/27/quebec-bride-drowned-while-takin...
Is it too soon for Darwin Awards comments
=========================================
Normally I laugh at damn near anything but for some reason, this is giving me a case if the sads! What a way to go, fast moving water like that is hell. I've gone over in a canoe in heavy white water with a life jacket on and you still go through the "washing machine" and spit out the other side so I can imagine this poor girl. That freaks me out....but hey, don't let me stop you if you've got a good one lol!
Submitted by agirl on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:31pm.
Submitted by EvilShoe on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:25pm.
No idea!
ETA: I looked to Yahoo Answers and found this:
Does female pubic hair fall out with age?
After not having sex for 10 years, I finally got the nerve to get ED medicine from my doctor. After a little unexpected foreplay I found my wife to have no pubic hair. I was shocked. She says her pubic hair fell out. She is almost 60 and has gone thru menopause. Is it possible that it fell out or do you think she shaved it off? Kind of bums me out.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100916110119AAuD9wX
__________________________
The best answer said for him to use Suave shampoo, LMAO not sure why.
Werkin that bikini like the butterface that she is! Scorching!
-------------------------
*tosses a bag of hot dicks into Jeanneee's trough* BON APPETIT BITCH! - Raul Duke, 1/26/11
Is that Steven Spielberg? Get your moola duchess!
Why is she married to Steven Spielberg?
·...¸><((((º>·´¯`·. ¸.><((((º> .·´¯`·..·><((((º>
Visit The Freckle on Lindsay Lohan's Lip on Facebook.
She looks partially melted.
Pretty hot for 86! Anyway, Google turned up a very interesting short piece about her, her titles and wealth in The Guardian:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2011/aug/07/spain-duchess-marriage-fortu...
Submitted by TexnDoc on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:44pm.
I read this morning about a Canadian bride.
Found a link:
http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/08/27/quebec-bride-drowned-while-takin...
Is it too soon for Darwin Awards comments?
I love how his torso is making a sad face.
I fucking love her.
her face in that main pic, reminds me of a Dr. Suess character. I can't think which one it is right now.
Grinch, maybe?
I hope I'm still around when MK hits No Fucks To Give age-can picture him in caftan, clutching a white russian and terrorizing the neighborhood with Elvie III.
Oh, and old girl looks fine to me-86!
Submitted by DiamondDogs on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:36pm.
She is virtually unrecognizable now.
http://i.rankingfamosos.com/imagenes/famosos/20110210/la-duquesa-de-alba...
********
Meh. She was always homely. That's a professional photograph where she had her hair and makeup done, nice lighting. Plus it's in black and white. Any decent-looking person would look stunning in those circumstances, but she looks like a chipmunk in a tiara. These ugly royals annoy me.
Thumb 5: her helper with the mommy belly shouldn't be wearing a bikini either. I wonder where they are and how can I get a ticket there because clearly, anyone can wear a bikini there with impugnity...
Submitted by DiamondDogs on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:36pm.
She is virtually unrecognizable now.
http://i.rankingfamosos.com/imagenes/famosos/20110210/la-duquesa-de-alba...
**********************
She was actually attractive in her youth. Sad what age and lunacy to preserve your youth does to some people.
OT - OMFG! Someone kill me. Boss has a friend visiting the office, with his twin 6 y/o girls. Running back and forth yelling and screaming.
the noise level in here is ear drum piercing.
Since I refuse to comment on a Kuntrashian thread, I'm stuck with saggy old Cindy Lou Who.
Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:28pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:26pm.
REPORTED!
=================================
:P
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:33pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:31pm.
I'm sure she likes to do in a fluorescent lit room, and she like a little tongue work to get her goin..
-----------------------------
Whoa... 4.7 billion?? I've changed my mind. I'd tap that in broad daylight in the middle of Time Square.
=========================================
Ah haaa!! lol, I too had second thoughts when I heard that. I mean how much longer can she live!? I do believe this is what Viagra was invented for!
is this what the 80s look like? I mean really ... scary
please tell me this is an exception
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:31pm.
--
It's not an insignificant sum, hahahaha *investigates if there's a stipulation for your lady-in-waiting* lolol
I'll give you the Clapper Whamo... *clap clap* Ha! UGH, the entire house must remain in the dark... ;p
•-•-•-•-•-•
"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•ღ♩♦≈❀♠♡░░░░
When they're bringing this old bag to the beach, they're up to no good. Oh, just die!
I read this morning about a Canadian bride. Married about 3 months ago who had to have some pictures of her "destroying the dress" or some fad (?) where she was going to wear her dress near a gorgeous flowing rocky stream and wade in and post the pics all over her Twitter and Facebook. Long story short her dress starts to get wet (think completely soaked towels and how heavy they are) she's in her heels on some rock and gets swept off and flows downstream and 2 hours later the divers find her at the bottom of a lake, 20 feet down and weighted down like she was wearing an anchor. Ha, what an evil dress. Destroy me bitch No destroy YOU.
She is virtually unrecognizable now.
http://i.rankingfamosos.com/imagenes/famosos/20110210/la-duquesa-de-alba...
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:31pm.
I'm sure she likes to do in a fluorescent lit room, and she like a little tongue work to get her goin..
-----------------------------
Whoa... 4.7 billion?? I've changed my mind. I'd tap that in broad daylight in the middle of Time Square.
_____________________________________________
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rly1ZZ076G8&feature=related ~ Kenny Powers
Submitted by EvilShoe on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:25pm.
I had a coworker tell me when you get old you don't have to worry about bikini area issues cause all your damn pubes fall out. And you start getting long course hairs randomly growing out of your chin etc. WHY she told me this I don't know but that started my omg stage about getting old.
---------------------
WTF? Is that true about the pubes? That's not true, right?
Submitted by WithinReason... on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:26pm.
Submitted by Whamo on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 1:10pm.
--
No worries Whamo, applications are open for 5 years
===========================================
I just saw a figure of 4.7 billion dollars!!??
Hmm...hopefully she likes to keep all the light off but judging by that bathing suit I'm sure she likes to do in a fluorescent lit room, and she like a little tongue work to get her goin..LOL!!
She is so fucking rich, it isn't even funny. Her art collection is astounding.
That's the beauty, I suppose, of being that rich and/or that old, or having confidence, or major delusion, or all of the above. You don't give a fuck. Good for her.
Yes, Lucifer Sam, she is definitely related:
http://vigilantcitizen.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/pale-man_l.jpg