Open Post: Hosted By The Human Pug Feeder
We should all bow our heads and give thanks to the UK's Closer for doing important work by slathering factual literary perfection on the pages of their magazine every week. If it wasn't for Closer and The Daily Mail, we'd have to stuff our brains with crap from The New York Times. THE HORROR!
Before you go any further, you might want to clear the room of any pugs, because they might start eyeing your nipple like it's a spigot of delicious fun. (If you want a pug to look at your nipple like that, then please close your laptop, get up, walk to the nearest police station and have a seat in the section marked "YOU NASTY PUG TONGUE-LOVING BITCH!") Terri Graham of California opened up to Closer about how she opens up her nipple slit to her daughter's pug all the time. For the past 2 years, Terri has been sticking her leche bag in Spider the pug's mouth, because she loves it and it makes her feel complete. Terri knew Spider had a taste for tit milk when the pug licked the tip of a bottle she had pumped for her then newborn son. Most women would shoo that pug away if she started licking a baby bottle, but not Terri. Terri pulled her boob out, dabbed a little peanut butter-flavored nipple cream on her tit knob and let Spider gulp away. Spider's hooked on Terri's tit and Terri's tit is hooked on Spider's mouth:
"People may say I'm a freak, but having Spider suck on my boob means I finally feel complete and a better mother. Her tongue tickles and I do feel her teeth, but she latches on in a way that they don't hurt me. I breastfeed Spider in front of the kids and they think it's amazing."
I know I should never question the journalistic integrity of Closer, but something in the milk ain't pug slobber. If this story was true, wouldn't Terri and Spider have their own show on TLC? The only thing TLC is missing is a show about lesbian bestiality.
And the NSFW version of that pic is after the cut. Cesar Milan, please try to keep your chonies on. GO!
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Big deal, she basically had the same experience that Bruce Willis's Mom had when breast feeding him.
Submitted by winniwins on Thu, 10/18/2012 - 6:31pm.
Deb- that is so scary!! I can relate having been attacked by a monkey. It was awful. He chased me up and down the beach with his boner until I got smart enough to jump in the water. For days after I thought- what if I'd fallen? My husband stood there and took picture after picture all while laughing his ass off.
^^^^^^^^^^^
late, but couldn't let this pass w/o a LMFAO!
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"Physical violence is the least of my priorities." - Drunken Albertan
Terri,
Your cardigan story is really lovely, that whole guardian aspect of it. But I kept on wondering where he/she got the cardigan and whether the employee working in the store that day got in trouble with the manager since there was a sweater missing at the end of his or her shift. Yeah, that's how my Gemini mind works lol.
Submitted by winniwins on Thu, 10/18/2012 - 11:35pm.
Wow that is scarrrry!!! I never saw him, thank goodness! I have also felt a man on top of me before, years later when I was living on my own. I literally felt something touching me down there and I also heard a weird snorting noise (yes, I know this might sound funny). I couldn't lift my arms to defend myself or scream. It was TERRIFYING, and then "he" disappeared all of a sudden. But I do question whether it was really a supernatural thing or not. I wonder if it was just some paralysis or some neurons doing something kooky with the dream area of my brain, or something else scientific like that :P. I read that sleep paralysis is more likely to happen when you sleep on your back, and after that time, I never slept on my back again. That apartment I was living in was new, however, so if that was in fact an "energy" of sorts, I must have brought it home from somewhere. I also had a lot of vertigo in that apartment; at least once a month I had a dizzy spell, so maybe my brain was just cray.
I know we pick up energies and bring them home at times, which is why I smudge once in a while and always open a window at least once every couple of days, and at least five minutes a day in my car no matter the weather. I've had people leave behind energy in my car when stepping out, and when I'm in a bad mood, I open the window while driving before getting home so I don't smother myself with it or bring it home. It works, and maybe that just means the fresh air is making me feel better, but so be it.
Night Terri, good luck with your talk tomorrow.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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nighty night..I idnd't realize it's almost 1 and I have to work tomorrow
Holy Moly...orbs all over my photos of the La Laurie house in New Orleans.
Foxxy, that's not right, ohmygah lol
Night Bambam, don't let the bed orbs bite. ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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night bambam
Yeah I saw the orb below the third button of your sweater in that pic. Something clung to you for sure.
I gotta go do some prep, don't wanna be blindsided by anything in dreamworld tonite.
G'nite everyone.
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You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
I find orbs on so many photos..I may have to make an "orb" folder
Yeah, I've got orbs floating about the place, not good at all. Withy I use the vidcam to see if there's orbs around.
Foxxy, damn you sooo hot girl! Little thang. :P
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You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
bambam's picture
Submitted by bambam on Fri, 10/19/2012 - 1:24am.
@foxxy, i'm expecting piccies from you if i am to perform as expected. i know you don't want me to disappoint. piccies now!
ok, you asked: http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://cdn.crushable.com/files/2012/...
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
What are you doing Bambam? Should I read back? video cameras? ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Ok Terri, sorry to alarm you. I didn't know the edit disappeared. Does it? I still see it.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I don't care if my name is posted....but I didn't know the edit feature disappears.
@foxxy, i'm expecting piccies from you if i am to perform as expected. i know you don't want me to disappoint. piccies now!
yeah terri, please come back with some info, this creeps me out as much as anything else. right now i'm hooking up my vidcam to see if there's any orbs about the room. i'm getting some feelings here.
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You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
No Terri, just said if you wanted to keep it or remove it.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Hey Bambam? You were having a moment? Alone with yourself online Bambam? heeheehe I still recall the apple cider incident, lol How you doin'?
@Foxxy, def pron. exp. ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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oh, is that a bad thing? I'll go back and check..I didn't go back that far.
Hey, I thought you all had gone to bed! hahahah
ETA, lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by bambam on Fri, 10/19/2012 - 1:04am.
yeah terri, i can understand it being behind but being ahead. what the hell is up with that? does that mean i stood still while time kept going?
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that's what mine did too. It was really 8:40, not 9:40. Freakish, isn't it?? I'm hoping to have answers because it's bothering me now...I don't trust clocks.
edited: I'll also ask about those blue lights over the old folks home. Someone in the group may know what;s up with that.
Submitted by bambam on Fri, 10/19/2012 - 12:59am.
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Fri, 10/19/2012 - 12:55am.
"then where are the usual greasy palms, huh? answer me that missy!"
i think i'll just direct you to that bottle of vegetable or olive oil i know that you keep in your kitchen and thereafter stay out of your personal business, tyvm.
ETA: @ Terri - bwahahahaha!
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Foxxy, I can drag them into files quite easily, but renaming them from DSN12098 to "Eric Clapton concert" takes time.
yeah terri, i can understand it being behind but being ahead. what the hell is up with that? does that mean i stood still while time kept going?
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You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
Submitted by Foxxy Brown on Fri, 10/19/2012 - 12:55am.
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hahaha oh yeah? then where are the usual greasy palms, huh? answer me that missy!
hey withy, how u tonight hon?
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You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
@bambam...
don't freak me oout about clocks. I"m going to discuss them tomorrrow night at a group I go to. My work clock stopped, so I put in new batteries. Clock was dead. No biggie
The next day, my husband turned off the alarm and went to work as usual. I freaked out because I missed a church meeting because I woke up at 9:40. For some strange reason, the clock was one hour ahead. No explanation.
Then the kitchen clock stopped. And a few hours later the one on the oven was wrong.
I don't know why. If I find out any info, I'll pass it along to ya.
@ bambam:
" checked other channels, every one was playing normal shows yet my watch is thirty minutes ahead."
probably because your watch is set to PORN Standard Time. Check yourself before you wreck yourself! ;-)
good nite!
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by winniwins on Fri, 10/19/2012 - 12:15am.
Hi Agnostic. That's it to a T. I've read that it can be hereditary and that if you suffer from it you have a higher chance of developing narcolepsy as you age. The despair and fear associated with it is truly awful. When you have an attack do you hear it as well?
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Hi W, well to be honest I don't recall if I hear it or not. I try to not remember much about it since it's such an awful experience. I do sleep on my side but of course I end up on my back at a certain point during the night and sure enough it only happens when I am flat on my back. I can understand that it could be a sleep disorder but what I don't get is how everyone who experiences it has such a similarly vivid recollection of the sensation as well as of the entity.
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How nice, to feel nothing, and still get full credit for being alive."
- Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five
Hey Terri! Just surfing a bit before turning in. Glad you're here, I'm currently having a "moment." I nodded off earlier tonight, when I woke up Dateline was on but my watch said it was newstime. I checked other channels, every one was playing normal shows yet my watch is thirty minutes ahead. I hadn't noticed it before. Strange ain't it?
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You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
@withinreason, replied aobut what? I'm multitasking and missed a few things....
You on the night shift Bambam? hi hi hi, lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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@ bambam-
you raise the bar of "bad" for the rest of us. [well, maybe not Jack] ;-)
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Submitted by Terri on Fri, 10/19/2012 - 12:43am.
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Terri, did you see what someone replied to your earlier post?
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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LOL Foxxy what a douchey picture of A-Rod. I cannot believe he doesn't realize how assholic that looks! haha Night to ya, sleep well! ;D
@Bacony did you click report on someone? bwahahaha. Night to you too.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by Terri on Fri, 10/19/2012 - 12:43am
please tell me you can click and paste them in groups of hundreds...
/someone would have to PAY me to do that
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Foxx aaaaaaay! HowUbeen hon? I'm always good, better when I'm bad.
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You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
Im organizing about 2000 photos from my digital camera. I know....don't be jealous. What are you up to?
Submitted by bambam on Fri, 10/19/2012 - 12:40am
hi sweetie - hope you're good!
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Checking in for the night shift. What's goin' on?
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You smell kinda pretty. Wanna smell me?
@MK
PHUCK! Please disregard a "reported" "click" regarding a beloved DLister. Over-extended on this end, and Hot Lips KNOWS the way to get back at me when I am not giving him enough attention is to attack my keyboard. Asshole.
Out for the night. Gotta give Hot Lips his bedtime treats so that I may have a chance of sleeping.
Hugs to all that need them. Friday is almost here! :D
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@ Within,
if sgt at arms involves sliding down a fire pole i pity the fool who thinks about trying to stop me :-P
good nite, see ya tomorrow!
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Hahaha Foxxy, he's got all sorts of fans already. ESE probably wouldn't even notice if we showed up! kidding, lolol ;p
Sgt. at arms, I like that! Does it come with a firefighter assistant, because I'd like to request one of those too, please.
*psst, teeheeehee you most certainly can keep the order* You'd make a good sergeant! Attention! *salutes*
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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G'night Within.
Agnostic- try to sleep on your side. It's supposed to help.:)
Submitted by SANS FARDS on Fri, 10/19/2012 - 12:10am.
ETA: hi and good nite winni and to all!
i'll raise your "what an ass" to a "what a douche" ;-)
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://bentcorner.com/wp-content/upl...
"Voodoo is forgetting who's the john and who's the whore." MK, 3/20/12
Sans Fards, I know, I never understood blaming a player for getting all the money a team agreed to give them. Especially when they have an agent like Boras. The salary is outrageous but didn't Beckham get something similar, like $300 Mill for 10 years too, and this was during his declining years!!
Night night Winniwins, see ya later!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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@ Within -- thanks for the 411. truly hope all referenced will return. OK for you to be the president of the ESE fan club if i can be the sgt. at arms?
Hi Agnostic. That's it to a T. I've read that it can be hereditary and that if you suffer from it you have a higher chance of developing narcolepsy as you age. The despair and fear associated with it is truly awful. When you have an attack do you hear it as well?
Mani, what do you expect from a guy who has not one, but TWO, paintings of himself as a centaur?
http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/ex-alex-rodriguez-had-port...
This gets me every time! What an ass.
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Submitted by P.T.Bull on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 10:33pm.
"This bitch is crazier than a pillowcase full of clear-level scientologist possums."
Hi Within, Hi Foxxy- glad you're back. Good night ladies.