Open Post: Hosted By A Liz & Dick Drinking Game
One of the biggest man-made disasters of the 21st century will air on Lifetime tonight and you people of the future (aka East Coasters and Central Time Zoners) get to see it first while us people of the past who don't have crystal ball TVs (aka DirecTV) have to wait until later. But no matter what time you watch this beautiful mess, we'll all be in the same condition at the end of the night: drunker than your average Lohan and holding pieces of the lungs we laughed up while watching La Lindz as La Liz.
There's a few Liz & Dick drinking games out there, but here's my own. Note: You might want to call up Costco and tell them to deliver their entire supply of booze to your front door, because you're going to need that much sweet nectar. Take a shot every time:
- You feel a light tremor under your feet from Elizabeth Taylor rolling in her grave.
- Your cat or dog mistakes LiLo's overstuffed lips for two earth worms in distress and attacks the TV screen.
- You stare at LiLo's face and forget you're watching an Elizabeth Taylor biopic instead of a Rip Taylor biopic.
- Your ears barf up bits of Spotted Dick from listening to LiLo try to do a British accent.
Or you can just wrap your lips around a bottle of whatever and chug during the entire movie. Only take your mouth off of the bottle to reload. That's what Elizabeth Taylor will be doing in heaven. If anything can make the spirit of Elizabeth Taylor fall off the wagon, it's this. Happy boozing, everyone!
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It's so hipster trendy to bash Lindsay... Honesty, it really wasn't THAT bad... She looked great but the script sucked... What are you gonna do? She did the best she could with what she was given, If Lindsay wasn't in it nobody would even be talking about it days later.... So there that.. lol
I skipped this steaming pile last night, and it sounds like I should be glad I did-- although I hate missing a good drinking game. :) However - having been a fan of La Liz and Dick, I have to tell you all to read "Furious Love"- a book that was written about Liz and Dick's life together, with her permission and she shared letters the two of them had written to each other over the years. If you read it, you will know how much they loved each other. It truly was a wonderful story, but damn this movie shit to hell. Lohan, go to rehab, get away from your family and the bad shit, and clean up your act, bc we all know you're better than this.
Submitted by Dog on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 2:46pm.
Submitted by WendyNerd on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 12:39pm.
What?
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She was awful, obviously put no effort into her performance, and it is evidence of how egotistical and narcissistic she is. But even if she had been good, the film would have sucked, for the most part because of how poorly scripted and paced it was. There were a bunch of superfluous scenes, and each scene was too short to develop a sense of genuine intimacy between the two leads.
Butterfly in the sky
I can go twice as high
Take a look
It's in a book
Pig-fucking movie
Pig-fucking movie
Submitted by WendyNerd on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 12:39pm.
What?
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
sans - I'd say it's on par with IKWKM. Suffice to say I had to turn them BOTH off. And I came upon IKWKM on accident!
Oceanlover you made the right choice.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
...530 comments?!!!...WOW...don't think I've ever seen a post attract that much verbiage on the D!!!
...was gonna try to watch this epic mess but in the end decided that life is too precious to waste even 10 minutes on crap like this...
...still...gonna have to check out the best moments as they pop up on youtube...
...a teensy little part of me feels kind of sad for Lohan...as awful as she was in this thing, sounds like she wasn't necessarily the worst part of it...yeesh...
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...'Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason '...
Submitted by the original be... on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 12:20pm.
bored - WORSE. (I can't believe I even typed that!)
sans - don't worry - Lifetime is showing the HELL out of this. It's on again tonight, I do believe. (Right now, they're airing I Know Who Killed Me. Can you f'ing believe that?!?)
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bahaha it can't be WORSE than I Know who Killed Me, can it? Whoever greenlighted that piece of dreck should be summarily eliminated.
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Submitted by P.T.Bull on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 10:33pm.
"This bitch is crazier than a pillowcase full of clear-level scientologist possums."
I couldn't stick it out. I went to bed. It was THAT bad.
Deeeeyam! That's alotta comments!
I didn't even know this shit was on last night but if its Showgirl level unintentional hilarity, I might just have to make time for it....
b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b
"I'm doin hoe activities, with hoe energy. Hoes are my friends, hoes are my enemies."
Lifetime ain't stupid. They knew good and goddamn well these drinking games would pop up worldwide and this is THE Only way people are going to watch this shit. By guzzling the good shit for two hours. Let's just thank the heavens this shit wasn't a mini-series or rehab centers would be overflowin'!
I's just sayin'!
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Facebook: Triston Negreaux
Please help support my greatest release yet, Heaux Confessionals©. (S)Introducing the 'Penny For My Thoughts' Campaign:
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I hear Lifetime just inked Ru Paul for the lead in the Marilyn Monroe Biopic!
Seriously they showed a snippet of THEIR Johnny Cash movie "Ring of Fire". Blerg.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
You know, I wish I could say that Lindsay sunk the film. But I can't.
Don't get me wrong--- she was AWFUL. But there was so much more wrong with the movie besides her. For me the biggest thing was that each scene was so short, barely there. The film was hideously choppy. We got no chance to relax and be with the characters, and there wasn't enough time in any of the scenes to allow anything to sink in or develop. There just wasn't enough time for their interactions to convey anything. So, as a result, the whole thing seemed more like a fling than a serious romance. There were a number of unnecessary scenes they could have cut out and used the time for scenes that could have worked if they lasted more than ten seconds. When Lohan does the "suicide attempt", it comes off as just a hollow cry for attention and the film really hadn't earned it because the scenes had all been too short to convince anyone that Taylor and Burton were truly in love. Perhaps if you had actors who had Tracy-Hepburn levels of chemistry, they might have been able to make it work, but anything less than that and you have nothing. Even legitimately good actors couldn't have saved this.
Some of that might be due to not having actual talent portraying Taylor, but the screenplay and direction was so poorly done that even with someone of Meryl Streep caliber wouldn't have made this good. How do I know? The Iron Lady was a crappy film, and even Meryl Streep's performance couldn't save it.
That being said, Lindsay was absolutely terrible. She didn't even TRY. I truly believe she honestly thinks herself so talented that she doesn't have to try. That it comes naturally to her. Sorry Blowhan: it doesn't. Even the best actors have to do research and practice and have to put in effort. But apparently your ego is so enormous you think yourself above the acting tactics of actors like Daniel Day-Lewis or Meryl Streep. This is a perfect example of just how sickeningly egotistical and narcissistic you are. You think yourself too good to put in effort in portraying someone. Too good to actually put in the work to at least SOUND a little like Taylor. Oh no, you're so TALENTED that acting doesn't require work on your part, does it?
And you can tell she didn't do jack shit to prepare. The voice is only the tip of the iceberg. Chris Pine didn't make himself sound like William Shatner when he played Kirk and it still worked because he at least copied mannerisms and syntax. He expressed an understanding for the Kirk character in interviews. You watch or read the interviews of Lindsay talking about Taylor and it's "We both like diamonds. We're both the subject of media gossip." Uh-huh.
And it's not like she's playing someone who was an utter mystery or a historical figure with no actual recordings of their voice or photographs of them. Not only did Taylor do a gazillion movies Lindsay could have used, but Taylor wrote books. She spoke openly about her life, experiences, and feelings. There's a rich collection of Taylor related things that would make research fairly simple. But I guess Lindsay felt like she didn't need to bother. Because she's Lindsay Lohan and therefore better than that.
Butterfly in the sky
I can go twice as high
Take a look
It's in a book
Pig-fucking movie
Pig-fucking movie
Hekki, compared to this, Showgirls was Casablanca.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
bored - WORSE. (I can't believe I even typed that!)
sans - don't worry - Lifetime is showing the HELL out of this. It's on again tonight, I do believe. (Right now, they're airing I Know Who Killed Me. Can you f'ing believe that?!?)
bored - WORSE. (I can't believe I even typed that!) What the...Now I've done it. I've infected the computer with Blohan Bloat and it's double posting on it's own. GAH.
I only lasted until she "chose" Richard. However I did have to come back to see all the shade being thrown. My god, it was glorious!!!
But I don't get it. If they really didn't give a fuck about actually portraying Liz Taylor then why didn't they just get a Liz Taylor drag queen??? I'm sure there would have been just as much chemistry. And the makeup would have been on point.
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"Most of us walk away hating our exes in the heart, but still loving them in the genitals." -Michael K
damnit! Walking Dead was on so I didn't get to watch this abominable piece of unholiness.
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Submitted by P.T.Bull on Tue, 09/25/2012 - 10:33pm.
"This bitch is crazier than a pillowcase full of clear-level scientologist possums."
Submitted by Hekki on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 11:24am.
This dingbat.
So to those who have seen the movie: is it worse/better than "Showgirls"?
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"Some are going to call this Lohan's SHOWGIRLS, but I'd remind them that SHOWGIRLS at least is ACTUALLY good. This not so much #LizAndDick"
Someone on twitter supposedly wrote that, but I'm giving a side-eye to Michael K, because I'm thinking he wrote it under a fake user/picture twitter account. Lmao!
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"And it don't matter who you are, if I'm doin my job, its your resolve that breaks..Cause the hook brings you back, I ain't tellin you no lie. The hook brings you back, on that you can rely."
"We're all so bored watching this my mom has actually stopped speaking and is communicating
with shoulder shrugs and side-eyes. #lizanddick"
Either her or her mom is a Dlister. Fess up, which one of you bitches here wrote that!
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"And it don't matter who you are, if I'm doin my job, its your resolve that breaks..Cause the hook brings you back, I ain't tellin you no lie. The hook brings you back, on that you can rely."
Why Lifetime why???????!!
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"I think my butt looks too big in these jeans."
This dingbat.
So to those who have seen the movie: is it worse/better than "Showgirls"?
I can't wait to watch this mess tonight. I am at jury duty - kill me now.
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
Finally, the bitch shows everyone that she sucks at life AND acting. That movie was shitastic and none of it made sense. I'm still wondering WTF was it about.
Holy shit. It's going to take me ALL day to read the comments.
*settles in with Southern Comfort and Smors pie*
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"Marriage is what you do when you decide one cock is good enough to let the owner annoy you for the rest of your life." - TrashyWilma
Submitted by Daniee on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 5:10am.
boredasfuckyo - Ooh, Donuts! Now THERE's an idea!! Are you dreading tomorrow or something? Hope you feels much better too! : )
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Yea I am, going back to class cramped up, bitchy and bloated stuck in a classroom isn't my ideal way to start the week. *sigh*
But it's almost over...only 2 more weeks after this, then the semester is OVAH!
I had the best donuts over the weekend..Some donuts have the glaze, but the dough itself is just dry ya'know?Like the saving grace is the glaze, but these were moist and delicious! I don't think I ever enjoyed donuts that much.I wrecked the shit out of that box of donuts! Hope you found some delicious to improve your night!
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"And it don't matter who you are, if I'm doin my job, its your resolve that breaks..Cause the hook brings you back, I ain't tellin you no lie. The hook brings you back, on that you can rely."
I can't wait to see the ratings for this. I assume there were huge numbers at the beginning, and then slowly people started turning it off as they saw how bad L&D really was.
Read a book and fell asleep early. I consider myself a winner, reading the comments ....
Submitted by crazyassmom on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 5:32am.
@bored, @daniee
As unbelievable
as it is, yes, the dumb bitch DOES still have some fans! "I love you Lindsay", "you are Elizabeths TWIN" (that was my favorite), etc. Quite the gagfest I must say! #HURL
Had one reply to me, "call me when YOU become rich, famous, and not an asshole". I replied, "you call ME when the same applies to Strawberry Snortcake". Good times, good times! =p
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Lmao! you sure the "call me when you become rich, famous, and not an asshole" wasn't white oprah diguised as a fan?
Lmao@ Lindsay is Elizabeth's twin. Lmao! Ving Rhames dressed in drag in Holiday Heart looks more like Elizabeth Taylor's twin than Lohan ever could. HAHAHAHAHA! BWHAHAHAHA!
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"And it don't matter who you are, if I'm doin my job, its your resolve that breaks..Cause the hook brings you back, I ain't tellin you no lie. The hook brings you back, on that you can rely."
Who ever does the scheduling at Lifetime?
Seriously, putting this on against a night of Pawnstar reruns.
Bad move.
I got sidetracked and didn't see any of it (I'd really only planned to watch ten minutes or so).
I watched that shit last night. There was nothing in Lohan's characterization, voice, appearance, demeanour, etc. that was even remotely reminiscent of Elizabeth Taylor. Also, why is this bitch so fucking bloated?
I'm calling a major FAIL on this one.
This was hands-down the cheesiest, most awful piece of garbage in TV history.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Yeah, nothing but trailers of this crapfest on YT.
I know there are a few Dlisters in this mess.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/26/liz-and-dick-twitter_n_2190156....
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by joe shmoe on Sun, 11/25/2012 - 8:59pm.
Submitted by mike on Sun, 11/25/2012 - 8:54pm.
Submitted by Bigbendy on Sun, 11/25/2012 - 8:48pm.
I started watching it on Netflix a couple of weeks ago, having never seen it and devoured seasons 1 & 2 in three sittings. But season 3 isn't on Netflix yet - and won't be until season 4 starts next fall. I've now missed 4 or 5 shows of season 3 which started this fall on AMC and figure if I tune in now I'll be all mixed up. :/
It's gooood.
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You can watch season three on watchseries.eu. That's how I watch American Horror Story, The Walking Dead, Downton Abbey, Supernatural, and other stuff I can't think of. It's a website that has links to streaming episodes. I would definitely recommend installing AdBlock before going on the site, though. The main site's ads aren't too bad, but the ads on the links are horrible.
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My obsessive fascination is in your imagination.
In the most pure #Gnesa fashion #lindsaylohan asked her "fans" to tweet positive reviews of the fuckery that is #lizanddick. Staying true to #lindsaylohan style she never did retweet any of them. I absolutely think #courtneystodden would have done a much better #liztaylor.
Omg.. this crap kept me from sleeping last night. My mind kept regurgitating these shitty scenes. Also I kept trying to think up new versions of "Suckopatra" and such like. Mr. IV refused to watch and stuck to football and falling asleep on the couch.
Submitted by crazyassmom on Mon, 11/26/2012 -
"you call ME when the same applies to Strawberry Snortcake". Good times, good times! =p
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Strawberry Snortcake....BWAHAAAAAAA!!! brilliant!
Submitted by suckandfuck on Mon, 11/26/2012 - 9:29am.
honey that voice of hers, it was like a less droopy, puffy Syliva Browne was playing La Liz!
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Honey, even fake psychic Sylvia could predict this was gonna stink to high heaven
Lifetime should change its tagline to:
Your life, your time.. we wasted. Sorry.
Somebody please put this mess up on Youtube, so the rest of the world (including me) can sneer at it too.
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Submitted by Darknight on Fri, 11/09/2012 - 4:27pm.
THE TRUTH. Making the world a better place.
Los Angeles Times commented: "Unfortunately Lohan and co-star Grant Bowler have about as much sexual chemistry as Kermit and Miss Piggy and none of that couple's tenderness."
twitter comments:
It's like watching the kid from The Parent Trap in a school play being stalked by a gladiator with a drinking problem."
"An actress who will never win an Oscar playing an Oscar winning actress in a movie that will never win any award."
"Bad actors playing good actors or good actors playing bad actors? OR bad actors playing bad actors? I can't tell anymore."
If I were her, I'd be beyond embarrassed, but knowing how delusional she is, she prolly thinks she'll get a Golden Globe or Emmy nom.
honey that voice of hers, it was like a less droopy, puffy Syliva Browne was playing La Liz!
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
i feel left out...i missed this shining moment...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
My 100 lb. chow mix is jealous of the huge steaming pile of crap that was this "movie". The only believable parts were the vodka chugging and the crying, when she played herself. Just, HORRIBLE.
I was only able to stomach this shitfest for a about 15 minutes. When she walks into the joory store I was yellin at my tv: Keep an eye on this trick - SHE'LL ROB YA BLIND!!!
LOL @ #lizanddick comments like Keith Richards thinks her voice is really scratchy... you'd think her downing pills with a bottle of vodka would be more believable..
Sorry Crackie but it's time to pack it up and put on an apron and cap and practice asking 'want fries with that?'
It's not available to download. I've got a drinking party coming and I NEED this movie for it- the quicker everyone gets drunk the quicker they will leave. Thanks to this it should only take 10 minutes.
I didn't know there was DNA in my ass!
Worst acting in any movie at any time ever in the history of movie making...including silent movies!
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Has there been a moving gif made of the roll the eyes and faint scene yet? I must have this 2 seconds for email responses to news I don't care about.
Didn't see the shit fest but I just KNEW the comments in this thread were going to be brutal and hilarious--- you hookers do not disappoint!! Thanks for the guffaws on this otherwise dreary Monday.