Open Post: Hosted By Bed Bath & Beyond's Twilight Engagement Ring
When you think of fine jooree, you immediately think of Bed Bath & Beyond. So Bed Bath & Beyond is the perfect place to sell The Twilight Saga Fine Jewelry Collection. For just $3,300, you can own a diamond ring that'll look extra beautiful when a single sad tear falls on it every time you realize that you spent thousands of dollars on a Twilight diamond ring from Bed Bath & Beyond Help.
The Twatlight diamond ring is the perfect ring for a Twihard who can't get a man and isn't ashamed of it. It's a ring that clearly says: "I don't give a shit about not having a man and I'm showing you that I don't give a shit by wearing a Twilight engagement ring I bought for myself at a place that sells bath towels and popsicle makers." Forever alone has never looked so sparkly. Jennifer Love Hewitt will take one for every day of the week.
I can't wait to see the commercial for this. Just imagine a woman lying in a sugar coma with Reese's Pieces' wrappers covering most of her body. Just as she opens her eyes, her cat, Edward Purren, jumps on a pillow next to her and touches her face with his paw before running off to the front door. The woman follows him, thinking that maybe he put another dead bird on her welcome mat. The woman is really excited, because she only needs one more dead bird to complete the "dead bird gift garland" that she plans to hang over her bed. She steps out the front door and lying on the welcome mat is a dead bird and lying on the dead bird is a Twilight engagement ring from Bed Bath & Beyond! She didn't think this day would ever come! Oh, Edward Purren! Cut to Edward Purren making a face that says: "Why are you acting so surprised? You're the one who staged all of this."
And if Bed Bath & Beyond wanted to honor the Twilight love story in a real way, they would've put out a line of exclusive Twilight toilet accessories.
(Thanks, Melissa)
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Thamar regarding LA me - Lysol kills cats. Their livers can't metabolize the chemicals. Better to use something else (but not Clorox wipes! Clorox chlorine bleach mixed with cat piss will produce chlorine gas and kill you! This is due to the very high ammonia content in kitty pee. Liquid chlorine + ammonia = poisonous gas.
ark ark ark @ "Edward Purren"...MK you are on FIYAH! Thank god for your posts, I'd be comatose from boredome during my workday if it weren't for you.
LA me, you are doing something so kind and letting kitty have your guest room too! Not to mention pooping in your Mercedes! Good ppl are out there, you will find them. Lysol will get rid of any probs from kitty's little messes. Peace little monkey!
Aw, LA me - I'm late to OP but just wanted to offer you my best wishes with the kitty situation. Could you not find any foster programs in your area? I could do some looking if you like. I have foster-friendly peeps in both north and south bay.
Submitted by tojo on Wed, 12/05/2012 - 12:53am.
Tojo...just looked back at my reply to you and I apologize for it. Thank you for the support!
Just e-mailed one of VQ's references. Waiting for a reply.
Time to retire for the night. I'm pooped out (both figurativley (sp?) and literally). Night all....I'll keep you updated. Thank you everyone for your help and support. I don't care what they say...THE DLIST IS DA BOMB!!!
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Why some turds evade the whirlpool...god only knows. They are survivors. The fittest.
- Hysteria
Who in holy pimp hell designed that ring? If you're going to spend $3300 on a ring, at least get one that actually looks like it should cost $3300.
LA you have a good heart and there aren't a lot of people that would do what you've done to save a life. Sorry it's so difficult for you. I know you are trying to do the right thing...
(((((hugs)))))
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...the end
Submitted by LA me on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 11:35pm.
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Hope tomorrow you have better luck. Don't forget to post at the store, work, fb, everywhere. Maybe add her photo? Someone will want to give the kitty a home. Poor thing must be traumatized from the fall. It's a hassle but she's so lucky you found her, otherwise she'd be on the street.((hugs))
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by Virgin Queen on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 11:24pm.
I'm in the South Bay. Beach Community south of LAX.
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Why some turds evade the whirlpool...god only knows. They are survivors. The fittest.
- Hysteria
Submitted by WithinReason... on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 11:24pm.
Problem is I can't keep her while waiting for a respnse to posting signs and sending out SOS's. I don't know what to do. It's no wonder these fuckwads just toss them out of cars....(not in ANYWAY endorsing that behavior)
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Why some turds evade the whirlpool...god only knows. They are survivors. The fittest.
- Hysteria
Submitted by tojo on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 11:16pm.
Aww LA, poor you and poor kitty. Can't you crate the kitty?
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Tojo...not to sound like a whiney bitch, but I've already bought food and litter. Blew off work for the day. Cleaned up barf and poop all night and morning (thank god I closed her in the guest room). I can not keep her and don't have a crate.
Rant Over...I'm tired
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Why some turds evade the whirlpool...god only knows. They are survivors. The fittest.
- Hysteria
Submitted by Virgin Queen on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 11:24pm.
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It's a shame a good samaritan can't find help without spending a lot of time and effort. Hope LA me, finds a lead from one of those links.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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LA, these are the suggestions I was given. They are pretty general not knowing your exact location.
http://nkla.org/
http://www.kittenrescue.org/pages.php?pageid=1
http://www.animalliberationfront.com/AR_Orgs/No%20Kill%20Animal%20Shelte...
http://www.save-a-life.org/adopt-an-animal/bring-us-an-animal
http://www.langefoundation.com/index/Home.html
http://www.foala.org/
Submitted by LA me on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 11:07pm.
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Aww LA. The kitty's scared. Have you thought of putting out a Help me find this kitty a home ad in the paper? How about posting a note at the grocery store, local college, church? There must be someone who could give it a good home. That's terrible you spent all day out and nobody got back to you. Hard day, sorry to hear it. I wonder if posting on www.petfinder.com would help?
You can't keep her huh?
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I'm just tired, been crying all day and had to put off my work today.
Life stinks.
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Why some turds evade the whirlpool...god only knows. They are survivors. The fittest.
- Hysteria
Aww LA, poor you and poor kitty. Can't you crate the kitty?
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...the end
Oh crap, LA, how awful. You're a good person for making that much effort. Only suggestion I have is to perhaps leave some food outside for the kitteh as she might still be nearby. As long as you don't have a problem with skunks or raccoons, that is.
Cmon KSTEW! Ok I realize you made a shitload of money endorsing this but this pic is about as believable as a pic of you at a zoo with Zippy the Chimp!
............................................
Of course not before pooping in my mbz (not the solid kind either).
But, just after I left my first post tonight, my doorbell rang and the neighbor found her in the bushes.
Guess I start all over again tomorrow.
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Why some turds evade the whirlpool...god only knows. They are survivors. The fittest.
- Hysteria
Submitted by WithinReason... on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 10:50pm.
Did you not find a home for the kitty? Are there no animal shelters nearby? :(
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Spent 4 hours driving around and making calls this morning. Went to 2 vets 2 Pet stores and the City Animal Shelter.
Fucking City said they only take cats if they're dead. Vets wouldn't even look at her. County shelter euthenizes. But the lovely local pet store went out of their way and gave me a print out of several private rescues. Except, most just had voice messages saying they were full or only accepting dogs. Only one answered their phone and gave me a number of someone I had already left a message for. No one has bothered to call me back. And to top it off...I got home and opened the car door and Kitteh bolted!
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Why some turds evade the whirlpool...god only knows. They are survivors. The fittest.
- Hysteria
Submitted by JTROS on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 6:53pm.
The Big 10+ is not a minor conference. But, it is a conference in transition.
That's a nice way of putting it. :) We'll see how Wisconsin (8-5, 4-4 in conf.) does against Stanford.
Submitted by LA me on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 9:55pm.
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Did you not find a home for the kitty? Are there no animal shelters nearby? :(
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I guess this shit goes in the "Beyond" section...
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"You will drink the black sperm of my vengeance!" Beyond the Valley of the Dolls
LA me, I'm here...
Virgin Queen....You still here?? I've had a very disturbing day. Sad Sad Sad :(
About Kitteh abandoned yesterday.
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Why some turds evade the whirlpool...god only knows. They are survivors. The fittest.
- Hysteria
EH, they're splitting it into three parts too? HAHAHA They're going to squeeze every last drop, for sure. I remember seeing an ad for all this joory for LOTR and ALL of it looked like cereal box prizes, ALL OF IT! Normal prices though, LOL
ETA: still don't see the Bed Bath & Beyond connection with this. Training future drones?
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by Event Horizon on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 8:14pm.
Actually the complaints in the early reviews seem to mostly be things that couldn't be helped, because they were in the books.
And yeah, why didn't we have all outlets hawking Arwen necklaces or something like that? At least that was PRETTY. The people who make Twilight (Smeyer, I suspect) really have the worst taste.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by JesusCrispies on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 8:21pm.
I would like to nominate this post for a Pulitzer
I would nominate the ugly Olsen purse post.
Because when I think of the perfect ring to signify my future with a true love, I think of a tacky-ass piece o' crap from BB&B, advertised by Kstew's rabbit teeth.
If any man tried to propose to me with that ring, I would wrench off his balls and dump him.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Submitted by annobanano on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 8:24pm
Haven't been to Northville in a long time.
It was such a pretty town. The Northville Inn was neat (at least it used to be) Lived in Canton
for 2 years. Couldn't quite afford Northville at the time:)
Submitted by vsminimoose on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 7:04pm.
I went to Moo U too! Lived in Detroit as a kiddo, moved to the suburbs, and been in Northville the last 10 years.
I would like to nominate this post for a Pulitzer.
AHAHAHA! Dlisted was my very first thought when I saw this in my email early this morning, but wasn't sure how to alert MK.
And the ONLY reason I'm on their mailing list is because someone used my credit card to purchase thousands of dollars worth of rice cookers to be overnighted to Shanghai through BB&B. No matter how many times I unsubscribe, they keep emailing so now I take malicious delight in reporting them. I've never even been inside one.
Submitted by WithinReason... on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 8:00pm.
This franchise is certifiable! Now didn't they do the same (and possibly worse for LOTR? My precioussssssss) LOL
*waves about the thread*
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Can you believe they're spliting the hobbit into 3 parts?!?!? The first one is already recieving dubious reviews because of all the fluff.
Milk it for as much moolah as you can I guess....
b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b
"I'm doin hoe activities, with hoe energy. Hoes are my friends, hoes are my enemies."
God, that's an ugly ring. Does it decode secret messages? "Don't forget to drink your . . . Ovaltine?!?!?"
Ha ha ha! Christmas Story for the win!
@dog
Idk if it's new, "i've fallen and I cant get up!" from the 80s come to mind.
Commercials do seem painfully more insipid nowadays than they were in previous years......Yoplait "its soooo good" and Moutain Dew "have your avatar workout with double XP" commercials come to mind.
~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b
"I'm doin hoe activities, with hoe energy. Hoes are my friends, hoes are my enemies."
Submitted by JTROS on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 6:27pm.
Seriously, who would willingly go to Arkansas for anything?
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Someone with no future.
Submitted by Brown-EyedGirl on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 7:53pm.
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So jelly of that ring, Brown-Eyed. Hahaha ;p
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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This franchise is certifiable! Now didn't they do the same (and possibly worse for LOTR? My precioussssssss) LOL
*waves about the thread*
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
░░░░♬♣☺♪◘☼♥♫•ღ♩♦≈❀♠♡░░░░
Someone help a heffa out up in here. I've been watching a lot of ID Channel lately and am noticing that a large percentage of the commercials are geared towards the Prehistoric crowd (aka AARP memaws and pepaws). Now, I'm wondering if it has always been like this and I never noticed or is this new?
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
HMPHHH - this is nowhere near as stunning as my genuine certified replica Princess Diana ring that scummy Kate is wearing now!
And I didn't have to buy it from a toilet store!
What utter horseshit.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
One of the funniest fucking things I have ever read in my life. Kudos MK.
Sucky,
Thank you for helping me stay on my low carb diet with talk of period berries *wretch vom double puke*
Submitted by stefystef on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 6:53pm.
Looks like a ring from Cracker Jack box or those machines you put a quarter in.
BTW, why is her mouth like that? I find it very annoying.
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That's her 6th finger surprise face!
You know, when a guy starts with one finger then two, 3-4 on up to 5, then he takes all those out and slips the 6th "finger" in.
b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b~j~b
"I'm doin hoe activities, with hoe energy. Hoes are my friends, hoes are my enemies."
Submitted by annobanano on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 6:43pm.
vsminimoose - I'm in MI - are you from the UP?
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I'm in NYC now but I'm from Oakland county - about 30min outside of Detroit. I went to MSU.
Wooo Hooooo. Where you at banano?
Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 6:50pm.
Submitted by JTROS on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 6:27pm.
Seriously, who would willingly go to Arkansas for anything?
Ouch!
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I was seeing if Jack was around and paying attention... lol!
Looks like a ring from Cracker Jack box or those machines you put a quarter in.
BTW, why is her mouth like that? I find it very annoying.
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"That shit was more staged and choreographed than Paul Ryan's soup kitchen visit."- MK, 10/16/12
Submitted by Jeanneee on Tue, 12/04/2012 - 6:42pm.
I wouldn't call the Big 10 a "minor conference," but the SEC is where the big money is. Even that fool at Mizzou is making $2.4 m a year.
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The SEC has more $$ to pay their players, too. ;)
The Big 10+ is not a minor conference. But, it is a conference in transition.