Justin Bieber's A Stoned Douchebag, And Back With Selena Gomez
Justin Bieber rolls out of his crib in the morning and takes a bong hit. He decides which thuglife dropcrotch leggings to wear that day while receiving a mouth hug from his waterpipe. He puff, puff passes right before he goes on stage to pass out rodents to screaming tweens who will surely rip the poor thing to shreds just to have something he touched. (Real talk - you know there's a Belieber living in a Atlanta suburb right now with a decapitated hamster head glue-gunned to the front of her dream journal. Poor lil' guy.) What I'm trying to say is that Justin Bieber is sssttttooonnnnneeeed. Do you blame him? He's under pressure! He's back with Selena Gomez and his screamy fangirl milita ain't happy 'bout that.
Radar Online posted some pics of mini-Hilary Swank and Mary Kay Letourneau Selena at a Salt Lake City airport being those annoying make-out teens you see in the food court at the mall with the lap-sitting and the touching of noses, and the Aeropostale bags. Take it to mom's basement, geeks! Anyway, shit got real in the Belieber section of Twitter this past weekend when those crazed infants got wind of this.
A delightful sampling:
@strongforjieber wrote: "Go back to your own friends and family. let justin breath and get your tongue from down his throat @selenagomez."
@CatchThatBieber posted: 'Oh wow. that's obviously how he thanks her for humiliating him in public. do you have a bit of dignity left?"
"Your relationship is faker than joan rivers face @justinbieber @selenagomez"
Why they gotta bring Joan Rivers' beautiful visage into this? Dicks. The New York Daily News (via Jezebel) sez that Justin will probably have nary a fuck to give about this seeing as he's a giant douche.
“Justin doesn’t seem to care and does whatever he wants,” a source tell Confidenti@l. One insider says Bieber’s team has had several talks with him, but “he doesn’t listen to anyone.”
Another Bieber insider tells us, “He smokes weed all day, from the time he gets up, and orders everybody around. He’s surrounded by hangers-on who say ‘yes’ to anything he wants. There’s no supervision.”
You mean a celebrity toddler who wears diapers made out of $100 dollar bills and has 30 million followers on Twitter has become an arrogant asshole? Heavens! Water has become fire and I've decided to eat pussy. What a world, what a world.
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Is he dressed for his audition for a role in Mi Vida Loca: the Sequel?? Trick, please. Call me when your period has started.
http://pinupprose.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/mi_vida_loca_movie.jpg
Submitted by bambam on Tue, 12/25/2012 - 1:09pm.
Why he gotta look like Anne Murray?
LMAO!
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Why he gotta look like Anne Murray? Isn't there some other woman he might look like? Y'all came up with Anne Murray because she's Canadian like him, isn't she?
Uh huh. Y'all just bigoted against Canadians, that's what it is. Canadian racists. Canadiacists. Canacists!!!
In the great tradition and spirit of Festivus, I got a problem with you people.
Merry Christmas. ;)
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HTTR
Submitted by ProfessorVP on Mon, 12/24/2012 - 9:22pm.
Prediction: he's going to grow up looking like Anne Murray.
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Holy shit. I swear I didn't read this before I posted my comment. Great minds, eh??
I don't get the appeal with him. He looks like Anne Murray.
Then again, I don't get the appeal with Chris Bown either and look at his psycho fans.
What is the appeal of this kid? he has no sex appeal, has shitty music and looks like a 10 year old girl.
Prediction: he's going to grow up looking like Anne Murray.
I'm sure he is a little douche of epic proportions but so what. He is actually an adult now and he is actually making a fuck ton of money for himself and other people. Do you know why everybody says "yes" to him all the time? Because their fucking paychecks come from the money he brings in and it is their damn job.
The most unbelievable thing about this whole story is the weed angle. All the access that he has - money and resources - I don't believe that he hasn't tried anything harder than weed. I mean, wasn't Britney doing coke at his age? Fuck. This little lesbian can't even get this right!
Going for the cholita look I see..
I finally realized why this jerk looks so familiar! He's the twin of Marcy from Married With Children!!!
http://www.tvacres.com/char_rhoades_marcy.htm
Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun.
-Ash
when are they going to stop shooting him up with estrogen.. this is the girlest looking guy around.
i'm not buying that this relationship is PR. first of all they tried to hide it at first. secondly they are very affectionate in public and also backstage where there are no cameras (according to witnesses). and they've been together for 2 years and he's even proposed to her.
a fake relationship would be over quickly and wouldn't have all these breakups. a fake relationship would be all smiles
I kinda wish some teenage girl who secretly loathes him would fake all the Belieber craziness, get backstage, get up close and personal and just slap him across the face. And then add a backhand for good measure.
I have got to know. Who keeps dressing him and allowing him to think he looks cool?
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
So embarrassed by this lil dweeb being a Canadian from my home province of Ontario.
Whamo- the eaton centre was whack packed with last minute shoppers today , much better out on yonge St stroll.
"If it were socially acceptable I would esconce myself in velvet. " George Costanza
His Twitter account has 30+ million fans? Suppose we should take some comfort that someday he'll be embarrassed at all this, his wussy hair, clothes, and face - lmao. Fast forward 5 years *wicked laugh*
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I think he was always a brat and that nice boy image is fake. This is not the first time we hear about his bratty behavior. Only now his own team are the ones leaking the story out. Anyways, with all that money and no control this should not be a surprise.
Oddly enough, I was AT the SLC airport a week ago (give or take) and there was some tragic figure in those sweat/jegging/diaper thingies who was NOT Justin Bieber. (Thank you, Higher Deity. Air travel is challenging enough with MY OWN toddler!)
Just act like a normal jaded slut, slash his tires, and MOVE. THE. FUCK. ON. MK, 12/23/12 (SEE? We're NOT all dead! Guess it's just us sinners and sluts!)
I want to punch him in the face. And If I had a daughter who was tweeting this crazy stuff I would ground her for life.
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Your Chick-Fil-A is showing. - ISprainedMyUvula 8/3/2012
Water has become fire and I've decided to eat pussy. What a world, what a world.
You so funny.
Not sure if I buy the pot smoking story, but when supposed grown adults incomes are dependent on a teenager (especially an 18 year old "adult"), whatever the kid wants, the kid probably gets.
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Shiitake happens...
Why's he tryna taint the ganja!?
How long before he moves onto coke?
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Y U no leave these two lesbians alone?
There's no way he smokes weed. Adderall or some kind of upper, maybe. I've been to his concerts, and no pothead would be able to dance and sing for 2 1/2 hrs like he does. Lol
* 100% hotness verified by WHAMO. :P *
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RIMADYL KILLS
I'm more and more convinced of the conspiracy theory that they are, in fact, the same person.
Bah humbug.
Damn. The only thing me and this little ass streak have in common is the love of good organics. Justine must not be doing it right though, it usually mellows you out, not turn you into a douchetwink.
Nice. Everything points to an obituary upcoming.
Dont care about these twats. The losers that get their panties in a twist over that twink are just beyond sad.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Why they gotta bring Joan Rivers' beautiful visage into this? Dicks.
I love perfection in the morning.
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"End well: this isn't going to." - MK
Someone's Twitter name is @CatchThatBieber? Bwahahahaha!
He fits my idea of Utah, so I'm okay with this.
He's gross and she's an idiot.