Open Post: Hosted By GOOP's Sweet Moves
You'd think that GOOPY Paltrow spent her New Year's Eve getting crushed moonstone enemas while chanting with the Dalai Lama and Deepak Chopra at midnight, but nope. GOOP spent her New Year's Eve on stage at Jay-Z and Coldplay's concert in Brooklyn. Chris Martin and GOOPY busted out some piping hot moves that burnt the edges of Beyonce's lace front AND the edges of Blue Ivy's lace front. The sparkling diamond water GOOP was sipping must've been seriously potent, because bitch did the "Million Dollar Baby" boxing move and the "stirring the organic, gluten-free batter" move all in the span of a minute. Little Apple and Moses Martin haven't been this mortified since they realized their names are Apple and Moses. Beat the GOOP out of that beat, Fishsticks!
via Jezebel
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thats fucked up
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God don't like ugly.
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:33am.
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I'd say your printer got overheated, LOL Next time tell it only to print 20 pages at a time. Or save the doc first. Dang printers. :)
@Johnnysgirl, BaconSlut night night tall hos.
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Alright horz, I gotta hunker down for real. If I keep slurping wine between the D I'll be a hot mess tomorrow.
Night!
drive-by howdy to all!
if anybody's a Marilyn Monroe enthusiast, the FBI released over a hundred, mostly boring pages, of the file they had on her...
http://blogs.smithsonianmag.com/smartnews/2012/12/you-know-you-want-to-s...
... i got suckered into printing the whole thing out for a friend... it killed my printer... no good deed goes unpunished.
see ya, all!
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
BunnyRabbit, RIGHT?
How can GOOP be so body-, image-, REFINEMENT-conscious, and still be so ungraceful? All that yoga and she still moves like a horilla (typo that stays - my first time, LOL)
This was more awkward than when my 11 yr old son asked me what a hand job was the other day. Thanks a lot ADAM SANDLER!!!
* 100% hotness verified by WHAMO. :P *
www.poopreport.com :)
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RIMADYL KILLS
Bacon, see you later, get that shit done gurl!
PHM and Louise, high (nyuk nyuk) five!
Submitted by Bunny Rabbit on Thu, 01/03/2013 - 12:02am.
Chris Martin a talentless fool. His band is the Kmart lite version of Radiohead. And he looks like he's put on a few pounds. Nipping on the lardons, eh, Chris?
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Ohhhhhh, no offense but are you kidding me?
Coldplay is nowhere close to being a Kmart lite version of Radiohead. They're not even a corner store, they're like a fuckin hot dog stand to Radiohead, selling meat rather than all beef hot dogs at that.
They're more like a junior high school version of U2 if ya ask me. :)
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TIPPYTOE!!! MOTHERFUCKER TIPPYTOEEEEEE!!! BITCH!!! TIPPYFUCKINGTOE!!!!! TIP!!!! EEEE!!!! TOOOOOOE!!! TIPPYTIPPYTIPPYTOE!!!
Gotta hooker out for the night. Craptastic stuff to do before bedtime, and it is rapidly getting past that! Great to touch bases with some fellow Amazons! :D *raises 11 Wide in cheers*
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PHM, Good evening! Sexy avie, of course when isn't Bardothot? Is the ankle all better?
@Bacon, hi there!
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Goop needs a rod stuck up her ass to correct that horrid posture. If you can't make yourself stand up straight, you've lost your "miss perfect" credibility, bitch.
Chris Martin a talentless fool. His band is the Kmart lite version of Radiohead. And he looks like he's put on a few pounds. Nipping on the lardons, eh, Chris?
I'm still debating whether Jay-Z's tux is gay or pimptastic. Either way, his overinflated ego and sense of grandiosity is sickening. I can't believe people actually pay to see him "perform."
@PHM
LOL Didn't see that movie. But I went to one of her flicks a few years back with a friend ("New In Town", or something like that) and neither of us could imagine her surviving a Minnysoooota winter. We is meat and po-tay-toes horz!!!
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Submitted by WithinReason... on Wed, 01/02/2013 - 11:53pm.
Good Evening!
What are all you AMAZONS talking about? Reads back...
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Louise, you still here? Omg, just spent I don't know how long reviewing and saving material for my courses! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh Not ready for this!
*Engage: procrastination mode*
*Setting: TURN ON*
lol
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Bacon,
You know that stupid movie Leatherheads is about Duluth? Well George Clooney Renee Zellweger came here to promote it. I swear Renee was about as wide as my pinky finger. If someone sneezed in her direction it would probably knock her ass over.
@PHM
Nah. Just a regular D kinda hor! ;)
I've always wondered that about celebs. It seems that the majority of them are no taller than 5'3" and 90 lbs. Like a good bean fart could blow them across a small room. *scratches melon* Is there some sort of imaginary talent/height cutoff?
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Submitted by BaconSlut on Wed, 01/02/2013 - 11:33pm.
You are so bad ;)
Cahn, Caan. Pffffttttt. He will always be one of my favorite imaginary drink coasters.
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Being tall/sorta tall has its advantages. Anyone else have recurring dreams of setting a cocktail on Scott Cahn's (Hawaii 5-OhMy) melon while he... Never mind! ;)
To tall hookers!!!
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Submitted by louise_brooks on Wed, 01/02/2013 - 11:27pm.
Tall ladies unite! There seems to be no in between on the D. It's like the Real Housewives of Atlanta; The Talls vs The Smalls lol
UGHHHHHH! Why do I have to click on what's trending on yahoo???
http://www.inquisitr.com/465713/mans-hairy-eyeball-caused-by-tumor-photo...
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"And it don't matter who you are, if I'm doin my job, its your resolve that breaks..Cause the hook brings you back, I ain't tellin you no lie. The hook brings you back, on that you can rely."
Submitted by BaconSlut on Wed, 01/02/2013 - 11:22pm.
5'8 is pretty tall..for a girl. My Mom is 5'4...tallest girl in her family. Needless to say I stand out around those midgets lol
5'11" here too!
Submitted by johnnysgirl on Wed, 01/02/2013 - 11:14pm
Yess! I am almost 5'11, so I say 5'10 just so I sound more dainty ;)
@PHM
Sorta tall-5'8". But I have the broad swimmer shoulders and, as MamaBacon says, I am proportional. LOL (She's a 5'1" size six shoe wearin' mini-hooker)
@Johnny's
I've got a day at home tomorrow, but I am trying to power clean and cook tonight so that I can find a few minutes to do some reading on the couch. Hey, our homes smell great, right? :D
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PHM, I am tall too, 5'11. Amazons in the house.
Death by snoo-snoo! *dorky Futurama reference *
BaconSlut, so am I! Dishwasher runnin, meat de-thawin, stinky trash can de-stinkin, laundry sortin, then I gotta do extreme ablutions cuz I have a "serious" day at work and I have to look normal. Heh
Submitted by BaconSlut on Wed, 01/02/2013 - 10:38pm.
Lol. Are you tall too?
Cooking and cleaning, huh? I have no energy for chores at night. I like to come home, put on my PJ's, make dinner and be lazy :P
@PHM
LOL Yeah, I can't judge either. I dance pretty much like Phoebe from "Friends" ran. Get me near the water, though... these 11 Wides are MAGIC!!! *wiggles brows*
Hope everyone is well. Taking a quick break between cooking and cleaning. *le sigh*
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I bet I look like that when I dance, which is why I never dance ahaha. She has no shame.
I "dance" like this when I have to poop and the facilities are a long way off.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Who is the chick in the black dress? A back up singer? I don't recognize her.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
@WR :D
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
THEY ALL SUCK WEENIES!!!!!
* 100% hotness verified by WHAMO. :P *
www.poopreport.com :)
<3-------------------------------<3
RIMADYL KILLS
GG, does that mean you don't use your safeword very often? Saucy. hahaha
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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Submitted by mike on Wed, 01/02/2013 - 7:29pm.
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What a horrible story, poor mother. :(
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"CAUTION: Delusion ahead." MK
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I don't understand what I just watched. We got two people dancing like they are going in to am epeleptic seizure, and one wearing what looks like a coat/vest combonation made from Members Only.... I'm in a shitty mood,I got nothing .
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"And it don't matter who you are, if I'm doin my job, its your resolve that breaks..Cause the hook brings you back, I ain't tellin you no lie. The hook brings you back, on that you can rely."
Yoboo, I need more on your alcoholism theory. I'm intrigued.
Was that Bey in the black?
Sarah Smile
Bam, when you croak just walk into the light. Then you have nothing to worry about.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
My safe word is Dick Cheyne.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
@ Cashew,
Smudged, done the salt thing, the sage thing, holy water, anointed oil, etc. etc. etc. The only thing seems to work only helps temporarily and this stuff seems eternal like it has all the time in the world. Doesn't bother me so much except this sitch was unnerving, makes me wonder about the afterlife, if/when you pass over is it possible to be enslaved or captured or some such. Creeps me the fuck out.
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TIPPYTOE!!! MOTHERFUCKER TIPPYTOEEEEEE!!! BITCH!!! TIPPYFUCKINGTOE!!!!! TIP!!!! EEEE!!!! TOOOOOOE!!! TIPPYTIPPYTIPPYTOE!!!
Bam, dont burn that shit until you get a priest to bless the place or get someone to sage the house.
"Let them all boil in their own hotdog juice." Deb 7/2012
Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 01/02/2013 - 7:36pm.
Mike - that story is very sad. Those poor kids.
For real. You find a 34yo father with 5 kids who actually spends time with them and that happens.
bambam- ooo! Tell us about it!
Mike - that story is very sad. Those poor kids.
bambam - what kind of stuff?
Jacko not gonna lie, if my BF left cash on the counter and told me to go to Toys R Us on Xmas eve, he'd probably get a severe tongue lashing (and not in the good way). And I'm still laughing over here at "Tippyfuckingtoe" muahahahaha. A pal of mine told me her safe word is "broccoli". People pick some weird ones.
Bambam,
Have you smudged your place before? And do you leave your windows open at least once a day? That energy can really build up in a closed house.
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Wed, 01/02/2013 - 7:07pm.
Submitted by bambam on Wed, 01/02/2013 - 7:00pm.
Jack, dude, I wanna be like you when I grow up. LMFAO!!!!!
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trust me, you do not... I've had some pretty fucked up stuff happen to me...
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Speaking of fucked up stuff, some weird paranormal shit happened to me as I woke up this morning. I'm only saying it to get it off my mind but I seriously think when I eventually move I'll leave a lot behind, maybe burn some things.
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TIPPYTOE!!! MOTHERFUCKER TIPPYTOEEEEEE!!! BITCH!!! TIPPYFUCKINGTOE!!!!! TIP!!!! EEEE!!!! TOOOOOOE!!! TIPPYTIPPYTIPPYTOE!!!