Afternoon Crumbs

RiRi is supposedly paying tribute to Marilyn Monroe here, but that forty five cent wig is totally “Colonel Sanders after a home perm gone wrong” – ICYDK

Leonardo DiCatchAHo looks like a vato trying to get down at a backyard barbecue – Lainey Gossip

There’s still a baby growing inside all of Jessica Simpson – Drunken Stepfather

And just like that, Jon Bon Jovi’s name has been written in saliva and mashed peas on under “most wanted” on every Believer’s wall – The Superficial

If Rainbow Brite grew up and became a hippy raver – Hollywood Tuna

Why do I have a feeling that Beyonce snatched Grown Woman from Basement Baby’s notebook? – Towleroad

Please someone cancel Brandi Glanville and LeAnn Rimes twitter accounts. Their fights would be better so much better face-to-nostrils – Celebitchy

Celeb whores with the Anthony Davis – The Berry 

The nerd boys just blue themselves  – Popoholic

RiRi wants a mouthful of hillbilly chipmunk – Just Jared

Alec Baldwin gave his unborn baby the dizzies at Cannes – Popsugar

The censors get next year off, because Seth MacFartlane will not host the Oscars again – I’m Not Obsessed

“Don’t bring me into this dark-sided mess!” – God – IDLYITW

Are we sure that chick is with Wilmer Valderrama? She looks over the age of 16 and that’s usually his cutoff – Moe Jackson

And Katy Perry totally peed in that water – HuffPo

The husband of the new Real Housewife of NYC looks like he keeps the bones of children in his basement. He’ll fit right in with the other husbands!  – Reality Tea

Jonathan Taylor Thomas is old enough to drink red wine now… – Videogum

This is pretty much going to be me when Shauna Sand dies – Jezebel

The only kind of pregnant lips I want to see on Kim Kartrashian are the ones on her face and I don’t even want to see those – SOW