I hope you have a Baby Wipe or wet nap near you, because Marilyn Manson definitely left a lip stick (shade: pre-period surprise) stain on your monitor. Wearing less paint on his face than your average Kardashian, Marilyn Manson pulled himself out of his Hot Topic-brand bedroom coffin to pose at the Hollywood premiere of Spring Breakers last night. Because of that white flour on his face and that dark red lipstick, Marilyn looks like an uncooked, deconstructed black cherry pie that dried out from sitting on the counter so long.
Marilyn brought his latest piece Lindsay Usich who sort of looks like a Taylor Armstrong wax figure that was put together using parts from a Lana Del Rey wax figure and a Molly Ringwald wax figure. Obviously, Marilyn and his piece were the hottest couple there even though Ashley Benson and James Franco tried to claim that title with their STUNT QUEEN whispering on the red carpet. I don't know if Selena Gomez is smirking, because she can't with that public display or stuntin' or because she remembered that she once dated Justin Bieber.
Here's a few more pictures from last night's premiere of the movie version of a cum-stained Body Glove tank top. In order: MM with his piece, the cast, James Franco, Selena Gomez, Vanessa Hudgens with the ATL Twins and Ashley Benson.
After months of hearing about this mess and seeing pictures of this mess, there's finally a mess of a trailer for this mess. You might want to get yourself a Dixie cup full of Listerine before you hit play on the Spring Breakers trailer, because watching it will leave a taste of dark tanning oil, chlorine, watered down Jäger, Mountain Dew Amp and dirty foreskin grease in your mouth.
Selena Gomez, Vanessa Hudgens and Ashley Benson are trying to scrub the Disney from their images by playing Girls Gone Wild-like skanks who rob a store to fund their spring break. Then after they get caught and make an appearance in court in their bikinis, they meet a gold-toothed, dick cheese-having James Franco who looks and acts like what you would get if you fed Four Loko to a Mogwai after midnight. The rest of the trailer plays out like something straight out of Brit Brit and KFed's old home movies.
Well, if this mess flops, the producers can always sell it as a commercial to Florida's Tourism Board. And Demi Moore should call her lawyers now, because the phrase "Spring break forever, bitches!" is her official life motto and I'm pretty sure she trademarked that shit.
Justin Bieber + James Franco + KMart wigs + a corporate apartment + extra large dentures + too much free time + an on-call weed man + everything in the medicine cabinet + a pink napkin over a flashlight = THIS MESS RIGHT THERE.
James Franco uploaded (and then deleted) a video to his WhoSay page of him, his rumored fuck piece Ashley Benson and some dude grinding and simulating dog sex to Justin Bieber's "Boyfriend." This is James Franco on James Franco and it's also the worst and scariest installment of Paranormal Activity ever. Before you say that James Franco is getting way too old for this shit, I'll have you know that HIGH ART knows no age. (But seriously, James Franco is getting way too old for this shit and shouldn't he be studying to get his 89th degree in whatever, or something?)
via Just Jared
Licking a mirror while sticking his peen in a Fleshlight modeled after his own asshole sometimes gets boring for James Franco, so he finds himself a human who will lick his face in between telling him that he's the most important thing to happen to the art world since Thomas Kinkade. Page Six says that 34-year-old James Franco is using his paintbrush peen to paint the portrait of love all over the cooch belonging to 22-year-old Ashley Benson, who's in Pretty Little Liars and who acted with him in that Spring Breakers mess.
Page Six says that James created the performance art piece "Artist and Muse, No. 23" by holding hands with Ashley in NYC's Washington Square Park earlier this month. Then in L.A. last week, James created the piece "BOO: A Love Story" by going on a haunted hayride with Ashley. Some source says, "They have been seeing each other for a little over a month, but things are going well.”
In between acting, writing, making music, taking every film course at every university and fapping out enough Franco cream to make a life-size cum sculpture of himself, I don't know how James finds the time to get on Ashley Benson. But lucky for her, he has found the time, because every girl longs to hear her piece say, "I'm going to make your pussy graduate with a PhD by sticking my diploma rod in it," while he's humping her.