Johnny Takes A Tumble
Before hitting play, you might want turn your speakers all the way down or staple your ear flaps to your face, because the dramatic ass paparazzo screeching out "You dropped Johnny!" til his tonsils fell off could wake a Lohan from her drunk coma.
Fresh off of pissing people off with his rape comment, Johnny Depp took on the drunk celebrity obstacle course in Hollywood as he left some restaurant called 25 Degrees the other night. Johnny made it out the door (1 point), scribbled out an autograph (2 points), got bro hugged to the ground by some Gallagher looking ho (-3 points), got back up (3 points) and then kept on signing his name like his nalgas just didn't eat sidewalk (20 points!!!!). You can't keep a drunk Johnny down! But the most impressive part of Johnny Herp Derp's tanked bitch stroll to the SUV is that not once did he shove his BIC down that pap's mouth to stop the fake scream madness. If there's such a thing as beer goggles, there must be such a thing as beer plugs and Johnny definitely has them shoved in his ear holes.
Johnny eventually got into his SUV and showed everyone he was okay by doing the heroin tap and the fisting an imaginary asshole salute! And no, I'm not entirely convinced that this isn't John Mayer.
via Gossip Cop
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I never actually saw Depp's face in this video. Are sure this isn't just a fake?
Also the way the guy held him as he was picking him up was strange - Depp was so stiff and "mannequin-like" as seen from behind.
Johnny, damn, your people couldn't get you in that car with a swiftness??? We've all been there. Key is to get from bar to car, then from car to home, in a swiftness. Christ.
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Bugs Bunny 'What's Opera, Doc?"- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C2VMqQ6XnmI (Beginning portion)
Dre,Eminem, Skylar- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VA770wpLX-Q&ob=av3e
Johnny's a mess, but I still would.
This video is lamer than fuck.
Submitted by lovelylaney on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 4:04pm.
I'm kind of confused? What all is going down in here? I mean I see some of you all argue back in forth, but it seems in good fun. And what's with the alts business? Are some people using alts to mess with people? So confused!
For the record, I'm not an alt.
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You can't be an alt! Not my "Little Britain" compandre. I just described my new boss to someone as a Jherri-curled Vicky Pollard. If I have to hear his "I'm from Leeds, so I'm down" shit one more time... Sadly and weirdly, there are people who do this. Performance art? Future book on internet identity to be published by some obscure university press? Or just some fucking asshole with a nasty streak? Mostly likely the latter. Oh well.
Looks like the guy stumbled and fell into him. They obviously know each other. Maybe his body guard.
<3 bjork
Brad Pitt & Johnny Depp (21 Jump Street)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VoWMTUfEg9Y
I'm kind of confused? What all is going down in here? I mean I see some of you all argue back in forth, but it seems in good fun. And what's with the alts business? Are some people using alts to mess with people? So confused!
For the record, I'm not an alt.
Submitted by Jintess on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 3:34pm.
Also Bjork..Gardening Girl is an alt.
(Not mine, I don't have any)
It's just kind of obvious.
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You ain't da boss o' me, Jinty!
Seriously, Gardening Girl is an alt? Whose? Oh well, if so, this character is nice. I don't mind alts; I mind the nasty duplicity. But what are you gonna do? If someone gets his rocks off befriending me with one alt while attacking me with another, what can I do? I can just be nice until they start showing their ass. And GG, if you are Angela and start showing out, I will post your previous shit. I'm about ready to do that with that piece of shit Madeline Ashton. If not, grow me some weed!
The paparazzi are douche bag scum and say and ask the dumbest shizz. What a moron.
Jintess!
That's fucked up! Im just paranoid and dont like how they freak people out. And to think I agreed with most of the stuff you posted and liked your kiddie avi. Well think what you want free country.
Also Bjork..Gardening Girl is an alt.
(Not mine, I don't have any)
It's just kind of obvious.
Cripes..again about alts.
Hit up MK and ask.
That's what I would do if I gave a crap
IGNORE THEM PEOPLE. This isn't middle school and someone pulling your hair. These are adults who are nuts. Don't engage, keep in the back and make sure the taser is charged.
IGNORE IGNORE IGNORE
And Johnny Depp is easily one of the best actors of our generation. Check Benny and Joon
Bjork you
Im doing my research. Perhaps next summer I'll have some herbal goodness to go along with my heirloom tomatoes.
I just dont like them upsetting what is going on here or those of us who arent bonkers/have issues.
Moving on now!
Thanks Dog and Jack :D especially Dog, thats whats up, and yes, being paranoid is just feeding into whatsherfaces bullshit, I aint down with internet arguments. . and I dont think its nervewracking to post for the 1st time, I been reading for years and feel like I know you all, its wierd I know, but I love the D! Best gossip site ever! IMO
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"I pick my friends like I pick my fruit/ my nana taught me that when I was only a youth/ I dont walk around tryna be what Im not/ I dont waste my time tryna get what you got/ I work on pleasing me cause I cant please you/ and thats why I do what I do.." -
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 1:59pm.
As I just posted on another thread, it seems that each time that The Forum is shut down, the Cenobytes come to the surface. Either ignore them or fuck with them. Some are so obvious. Try all they might, they will never ruin dlisted for me (and many) because even if MK shut down the Comments, I'd still come here to read his posts, which I always do. Some of these folks are so dumb, you gotta laugh or take a poke.
Just try growing some weed so that you can sell it to us. Can't wait until you meet NDNChief (where has that hooker been lately)?
Bjork you
I was just bumming cos the alt situation is flaring up again. (As a newbie posting and someone who has read this blog for sometime I can pretty much spot them but still rely on the regulars for help. But yeah a new person doesnt start calling you all by nick names) Any way - just IGNORE them please and keep the funny going. I come on here for a laugh and have on occasion learned somethings. Yes, I am afraid of being accused of being an alt but hey I guess I just have to stick around longer than it takes to make up a name and find a wierd avi.
And yes I dont think there is enough fisting in the world!
The only person not acting like a crazed lunatic in that video is Johnny.
Submitted by Gardening Girl on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 1:46pm.
:(
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Is that a sad fate about Johnny or about the state of fisting?
Submitted by whippersnapper on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 12:19pm.
Fucking A, some of you guys are either fucking blind or totally wasted! If Johnny was drunk or not is besides the point, that fat guy in the hat pushed him over! Watch the video again. What an asshole.
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I do think Depp's drunk-ish by the way he moves in the video, but, yeah, his kids aren't with him, so there's no reason he shouldn't be. He probably would have been fine if that bloke in the hat hadn't charged at him.
I like Johnny, but I find his current movie choices frustrating. He made a string of really excellent films in the 90's and early 2000's, and now he repeats himself more often than not.
I think anymore his wife (or girlfriend or whatever she is) makes more interesting movie choices than he does.
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Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
:(
What's all this talk about fisting?
SHUT. IT. BJORK!!!!!!!!!!!
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011
STOP THE ALT INSANITY! FFS, guys, this is exactly what Pip/Fraggle wants! She wants you to be paro about every newbie and each other! You are playing right into the stupid bitch's hands!
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
Submitted by jack-n-the-hat on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 1:08pm.
Submitted by D-vine Lister on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 1:04pm
I don't think you are an alt.
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Stop trying to get in her pants and feel her boobies, jack.
I am sorry, but NO NEWBIE just jumps in calling everyone by nicknames. Everyone tends to be on the meek side, because it is nervewracking jumping in here. I remember.
And Britney has stumpy, ugly legs.
Now I am off to work.
whatever.
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No not "baby" anymore....if I need you I'll just use your simple name
Only kisses on the cheek from now on, and in a little while, we'll only have to wave
-Fiona Apple
He might be drunk, he might be not, that doesn't mean that he spends his life drinking himself into oblivion, for eff's sake.
That arm gesture here where I live means just one thing... LOL
Submitted by D-vine Lister on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 1:04pm
I don't think you are an alt.
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"I have no snacks for you, only death." ~ annobanano, 08/03/2011
@PSL and IrishFury I am a new poster to the D, been reading for some time now, lurking, never signed up. Was gonna post my 1st post saturday when I signed up but realized some Holy fuck turmoil going down and figured it wasnt in my best interest. Im not an alt, and have NEVER posted before today under any name. Im not here to start any shit, just enjoy MK's posts and the comments. Almost all of you are hilarious, except the shit starters of course. I know its a bad time to be a newby, but im not gonna let some frag stop me. . and in my opinion britbrit has killer legs and does look awesome in booties or whatever you said. . but thats only cause I have chicken legs LOL
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"I pick my friends like I pick my fruit/ my nana taught me that when I was only a youth/ I dont walk around tryna be what Im not/ I dont waste my time tryna get what you got/ I work on pleasing me cause I cant please you/ and thats why I do what I do.." -The lovely Ms.E.Badu
Johnny!!! Borracho after my own heart!!! The dude who knocked Johnny down his name is Josh Richman and he used to be an actor. He's been friend's with Johnny for a long time.
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I'M DONESVILLE!
Nourish the Inner Asshole
Borrachas of the world unite and take over!
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 12:45pm.
D-vine Lister, if you are a new poster, Britney looks good in ankle boots.
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Oh......LOLOLOLOL!
I was thinking along those lines too. In fact, I pity de fool who is really new around here because of recent events!
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Dark-sided!
Face it, girls. The Depp got drunk and ate pavement.
Deal with it.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
D-vine Lister, if you are a new poster, Britney looks good in ankle boots.
please. I am out of here. Have a good day everybody.
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No not "baby" anymore....if I need you I'll just use your simple name
Only kisses on the cheek from now on, and in a little while, we'll only have to wave
-Fiona Apple
Yeah, drunk or not, I can't help but feel sorry for him. He's just trying to get to his car, and he is nice enough to sign autographs, even after being knocked down.
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I'm bored with babies and engagements and happiness and joy and shit. - ImpertinentVixen
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 11:36am.
Submitted by D-vine Lister on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 11:19am.
@ Whamo: not DD only small A's they didnt even flop around when I shimmied *hangs head in IBT shame* (LOL)
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Never never be ashamed of your perky A's!lol You can be sure we like them in all shapes and sizes and I'm sure they're just as pretty as can be :)
*take a mental snapshot of Viney's a cuppers*
^^^^^^^
Mine are between a C and a D (depending on when Auntie Flo makes an appearance) but if I had DDs, I think I'd have to get them lopped off.
agreed, most of my female friends have huge Tats and my aunt has tripple d's .. needless to say, they are always complaining bout back problems, and the all around discomfort, so I completely accept my chiquita tatas, I'd rather have a scrumptious round booty anyday ;D
aww and Whamy, you gave me my 1st d-listed nickname.. I feel sooo.. Speshal!! <3
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"I pick my friends like I pick my fruit/ my nana taught me that when I was only a youth/ I dont walk around tryna be what Im not/ I dont waste my time tryna get what you got/ I work on pleasing me cause I cant please you/ and thats why I do what I do.." -The lovely Ms.E.Badu
that's justin bobby.
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watching hardcore ufos
Submitted by Whamo on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 11:36am.
Submitted by D-vine Lister on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 11:19am.
@ Whamo: not DD only small A's they didnt even flop around when I shimmied *hangs head in IBT shame* (LOL)
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Never never be ashamed of your perky A's!lol You can be sure we like them in all shapes and sizes and I'm sure they're just as pretty as can be :)
*take a mental snapshot of Viney's a cuppers*
^^^^^^^
Mine are between a C and a D (depending on when Auntie Flo makes an appearance) but if I had DDs, I think I'd have to get them lopped off.
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
For CDAN fans, I believe this answers an old Blind Item from a few years back. Something about an A+ lister who pretends to have the perfect family life, but drinks himself into oblivion in Hollywood bars. Brad and Johnny were the popular guesses.
Fucking A, some of you guys are either fucking blind or totally wasted! If Johnny was drunk or not is besides the point, that fat guy in the hat pushed him over! Watch the video again. What an asshole.
Even if he was sober he would've fell over with that grizzly bear on top of him. And is it public drunkenness if you're going from restaurant to car? And my god those paps are obnoxious. Not only are they intrusive but they always yell out some annoying bullshit, never fails. And why do they all have accents?
Hmmmm...I looked at the clip again. That arm gesture looks as if he is inviting those phtogs to go get fisted.
Well, shazbot! Why, Johnny? WHY?
What a greasy drunk. He looks like he smells real bad and probably has a cheesy peen.
Morning all!
I agree with you Deb. Who here is the same person they were in their 20's? I certainly am not. If I met my 20 year old self I'd most likely call her a CUNT and a few other things. So Johnny had a few too many. It happens.
Good god, those Hollywood paparazzi are about as slimy as they come. I love the way that slimeball acted so concerned that someone had knocked Johnny Depp down. He could give a shit if Depp was gunned down right there on the sidewalk as long as he got his autograph so he could sell it somewhere.
because he is shitfaced drunk?
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No not "baby" anymore....if I need you I'll just use your simple name
Only kisses on the cheek from now on, and in a little while, we'll only have to wave
-Fiona Apple
why is everyone so quick to blame this episode on JD's "public drunkeness"? the way it looks to me, the one guy in the hat MADE him fall, regardless of JD's alcohol consumption. and i am not coming to the defense of this actor, but i think being quick to come to superficial judgments bring about an ugliness of humanity.
watching stuff like this makes me pity hollywood types. not all the money and fame in the world makes this crap worth it. not.one.bit. it's all very lowbrow and epitomizes the lack of class and sophistication of hollywood culture.
Submitted by D-vine Lister on Tue, 10/11/2011 - 11:19am.
@ Whamo: not DD only small A's they didnt even flop around when I shimmied *hangs head in IBT shame* (LOL)
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Never never be ashamed of your perky A's!lol You can be sure we like them in all shapes and sizes and I'm sure they're just as pretty as can be :)
*take a mental snapshot of Viney's a cuppers*
I'm by nature a bigger clutch than he is, but at least I can hold my liquor. His public drunkenness and the eyeliner he wears on occasion make him most unappealing to me.
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Rusty, tu nous manque! Sois gentil et donne-nous de tes nouvelles!
Looks like that guy pushed him down!